Business Communication Chapter 8 Writing Negative Messages Your Faucets Show Promise But Before Put Them Our

8: Writing Negative Messages

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Your faucets show promise, but before we put them on our shelves in more than a

thousand stores (and growing), we want to ensure that you’ll realize the success you

expect. The panel believes that your product’s current design is too ornate and that the

material used would not appeal to the majority of our customers. Slight modification of

8-26. This letter is tactless, “we” oriented, and negative. It suffers from these additional

problems:

2. The writer fails to thank the student for applying.

4. The notification of rejection is undiplomatic and tactless.

6. Closing with an apology is unnecessary and negative.

Here’s one version of the revised letter:

EQUIFAX Credit Information Services, Inc.

P.O. Box 740241

Atlanta, GA 30374

openings. Thank you for thinking of Equifax. We wish you the best of luck in finding a summer

position.

Sincerely,

Yvonne Ward

Human Resources

(LO 8.5; AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

EXPAND YOUR SKILLS

Critique the Professionals: Students’ responses will vary, but all should include specific

references to concepts and guidelines from the chapter. Particularly relevant are: (1) the

questions to consider in organizing the message; (2) the guidelines for deciding whether or not to

apologize; (3) the advice on maintaining a professional tone; and (4) the strategy for closing

negative messages on a positive note. (LO 8.1; AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

CASE SOLUTIONS

On the following pages are suggested solutions for this chapter’s cases.

8-27. Message Strategies: Refusing Claims and Requests for Adjustment

To: JackSimmons11@gmail.com

From: KellyDolan@TechCases.com

Subject: Request for Reimbursement

Dear Mr. Simmons,

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Your message indicated that the damage to your phone was incurred when it was dropped into a

hog barn and crushed by a 900-pound boar. TechCases are designed to protect smartphones from

Sincerely,

Kelly Dolan

(LO 8.4; AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-28. Message Strategies: Rejecting Suggestions and Proposals; Communication Ethics:

Making Ethical Choices

Re: Product Review Suggestion

Dear Amar,

I’m sure we all agree that your dedication to our start-up is unmatched. I know I couldn’t ask for

a partner more devoted to ensuring that our products are well received and attract as many

shoppers as possible.

However, I am uneasy about the way your last email might be interpreted. I wouldn’t want any

of our employees to think that writing false product reviews is how we want to do business. Our

products are good enough to succeed on their own merits without this sort of activity. Also, I

8-29. Message Strategies: Making Routine Negative Announcements

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Tweet 1: P!nk’s concert tonight is cancelled due to health issues – P!nk is so sorry to disappoint

her fans but is following her doctor’s orders

Tweet 2: Refunds available for tix bought at the box office—refunds automatically applied for

tickets bought online or via phone

(LO 8.5; AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-30. Message Strategies: Rejecting Suggestions and Proposals

Dear Kimtoya,

Thank you for your message. I really enjoyed reading about your school’s chess club. I could

relate to many of the issues you cited, and understand what a feat it is to maintain such a thriving

organization.

Your proposal to form a national organizational structure has much appeal, including unified

branding and recruiting, the opportunity to share best practices, and the chance to socialize with

8-31. Message Strategies: Rejecting Suggestions and Proposals

Note: This message needs to be handled with some tact to maintain a positive working

relationship with the employee. However, the proposal was not solicited, so the manager doesn’t

have to explain why he or she rejected something that was asked for. A brief buffer is sufficient,

followed by the reasons for rejecting the proposal.

8-32. Message Strategies: Making Routine Negative Announcements

To: <All Employees>

Subject: Regarding the ‘Helping Our Hometown Grow’ program

Hello everyone,

Over the past 10 years, we have been able to help nearly 500 families of Norwood start their own

8-33. Message Strategies: Rejecting Suggestions and Proposals

Everyone on the Android team is a big fan of our product enthusiasts. We are grateful for the

product tips and technical advice they share and the great product suggestions they make. Their

contributions truly add to the Android experience for millions of users.

8-34. Message Strategies: Making Negative Announcements

Note: Because the concierge service is so popular, this announcement is sure to disappoint the

employees who’ve taken advantage of it. The indirect approach will probably be best, and it will

be important to assure the audience that the company will do all it can to restore the benefit in

the future.

Since it was implemented last year, the employee concierge service has turned out to be one of

8-35. Message Strategies: Making Negative Announcements on Routine Matters

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Whitechapel,

I really enjoy helping other people learn and pride myself on giving everything I can to help all

of my clients reach their full potential.

8-36. Message Strategies: Refusing Requests for Recommendations

Hi Dana—lovely to hear from you. I have fond memories of our time together in our business classes at

college.

8-37. Message Strategies: Negative Performance Reviews

Note: You have several goals in this message. First, it’s important to document your concerns

about Bridgewater’s performance. This may help her improve, but if she fails to do that, you’ll

have something in writing to fall back on later. Second, she’s a well-respected and highly

qualified company representative, so you want to make it clear that you value her contributions

and are ready to help her improve her performance in the areas you describe. (This sample

response calls for a meeting, but students should understand that it would be important to follow

up with another document detailing the results of that conversation.)

DATE: April 5, 2019

TO: Elaine Bridgewater

FROM: Karen Sykes

RE: Intermediate Performance Review

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First, I want to let you know how much I appreciate the remarkable credibility and knowledge

you’ve brought to our company. Your experience as a former touring pro has earned immediate

respect from our retailers and customers, and has undoubtedly enhanced our sales. Your energy

level is incredible, and you’ve worked hard to build a strong rapport with the resellers you assist

day in and day out. No one here knows the game as well as you do.

All of this shows that you are well qualified for the key role you play in maintaining positive

relationships with our retailers. However, we’ve recently received a number of complaints

regarding your communication with this important group. Specifically, retailers have expressed

dissatisfaction based on:

Let’s meet early next week to talk over some strategies for addressing these concerns. I am ready

to help in whatever ways I can. Would Tuesday at 9:00 a.m. work for you? Please call me at

8-38. Message Strategies: Refusing Requests for Recommendations

Note: While this request may be uncomfortable at first, the sender should recognize that turning

the request into a positive opportunity will benefit Lang more than an inflated or untrue

recommendation. By providing positive information on one set of skills, the sender is helping

Lang be realistic about her employment goals—thereby narrowing her search to appropriate

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I have always considered your core strength to be your programming skills, and I remember how

your technical wizardry saved many of our client projects. With this in mind, I can certainly

write a recommendation of your brilliant technical skills on my LinkedIn profile.

8-39. Message Strategies: Negative Organizational Messages

Note: Although this message will be distributed internally, it will still be important to avoid

including any comments you would not want the public to see. The primary goals are to prepare

employees for the negative reaction that will follow removing the Looney Launch from

production, and to help them understand the reasons behind your decision.

[post title] Looney Launch to Be Discontinued

The Looney Launch bicycle ramp has turned out to be one of our company’s most popular

products, and I thank all of you for your efforts in making it a success. However, we have

recently learned of a lawsuit initiated by the parents of a child who was injured while using the

8-40. Message Strategies: Responding to Rumors

Tweet 1: Tatum Housewares produces Moonstone Cookware, high-quality cookware that

produces safe, delicious food

8-41. Message Strategies: Responding to Rumors and Public Criticism

Note: This message provides an opportunity to turn a negative into a positive. By being

proactive, the owner should meet the poor review head on by acknowledging the complaint,

apologizing, and closing on a positive note by offering the customer an unexpected benefit. If

prepared correctly, this message will convert a one-time customer into one who is appreciative

and, therefore, loyal.

[www.yelp.com/biz/macrina-bakery-and-cafe-seattle-3]

[customer review; from website]

Anna F.

Portland, OR.

I have to say, after reading the review I’m utterly under whelmed. We ordered two egg bialys, an

orange juice and a small iced latte for $20. The egg sandwich was really soggy from an

overabundance of giant chunks of onions and peppers and fell apart and lacked any seasoning. I

ordered a non-fat latte and upon retrieval it didn’t look like skim. When I asked if it was skim I

was told, “no, that’s not what it said.” I told her that I had ordered skim and she stared at me

flatly and repeated, “that’s not what it said,” turned on her heel and went to make another. There

was no sorry, comment, a “here you go,” nothing. . . just handed me a new one and I walked

away. There you have it. . . My one and only trip to Macrina—never again.

[possible owner response]

Thank you, Anna, for coming to Macrina. I’m very sorry to hear the sandwiches you ordered

IMPROVE YOUR GRAMMAR, MECHANICS, AND USAGE

Level 1: Self-Assessment—Semicolons and Colons

8-42. This letter looks good; that one doesn’t. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

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8-44. The Zurich airport has been snowed in; therefore, I won’t be able to meet with you before

January 4. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-46. Only two firms have responded to our survey: J. J. Perkins and Tucker & Tucker. (AACSB

Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-48. Please be sure to interview these employees next week: Henry Gold, Doris Hatch, and

George Iosupovich. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-50. You shipped three items on June 7; however, we received only one of them. (AACSB Tag:

Written and oral communication)

8-52. The workers wanted an immediate wage increase; they had not had a raise in nearly two

years. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-54. His writing skills are excellent; however, he still needs to polish his management style.

(AACSB Tag: Written and oral communication)

8-56. Remember this rule: When in doubt, leave it out. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral

communication)

Level 2: Workplace Applications

8-57. Hector, Julie, and Tim’s report was well received by the committee. (AACSB Tag: Written

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potential customers for his minority-owned company. (AACSB Tag: Written and oral

communication)

Level 3: Document Critique—Well-Written Solution

TO: <all.employees>

SUBJECT: Health Insurance Changes

Unlike many companies, Bright Manufacturing has always paid 100 percent of medical care

insurance for its employees, absorbing the recent 10–20 percent annual cost increases in order to

provide this important benefit. Last year, we worked diligently with our provider, Blue Cross of

California, to juggle rising costs so that we could continue this tradition.

1. If you choose to stay with the existing Blue Cross Plus plan, your co-payments will be $10

for office visits; $50 for emergency room visits.

2. If you choose to stay with the existing Blue Cross Plus plan, Bright will pay 80 percent of

your insurance coverage (including 10 percent of the cost increase) and 100 percent of your

3. If you choose to switch coverage, Bright will provide a fully paid alternative health plan at

no cost to employees: Blue Cross HMO. If you opt to switch to this new plan, you must do so

during our Open Enrollment period, November 20 to December 1, 2018.

For anyone choosing to change coverage, forms are available in the Human Resources office and