CHAPTER 9
SPECIALIZED TACTICS FOR GETTING ALONG WITH OTHERS IN THE
WORKPLACE
CHAPTER OUTLINE AND LECTURE NOTES
This chapter presents a variety of strategies and tactics aimed at building constructive
relationships with a person’s manager, coworkers, and customers. Along the way, we
include information about coping with difficult bosses.
I. DEVELOPING A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR
MANAGER OR TEAM LEADER
Getting along well with your manager is the most basic strategy for advancement.
Obtaining good performance reviews and receiving favorable feedback depends on a
good relationship with the person to whom you report. Following are a variety of
approaches that lead to constructive relationships with an immediate superior.
A. Create a Positive First Impression
become a competent performer are your education, training, personality
characteristics, job experience, and special skills such as being able to organize
your work. An advanced way of displaying good job performance is to assist your
manager with a complex problem he or she faces.
C. Display a Strong Work Ethic
1. Work hard and enjoy the task.
2. Demonstrate competence even on minor tasks.
3. Assume personal responsibility for problems.
4. Assume responsibility for free-floating problems.
5. Get your projects completed promptly.
6. Accept undesirable assignments willingly.
D. Be Dependable and Honest
Dependability is a critical employee virtue. If an employee can be counted on to
deliver as promised and to be at work regularly, that employee has gone a long
way toward impressing the boss.
E. Be a Good Organizational Citizen
An especially meritorious approach to impressing key people is to demonstrate
problems reflects an entrepreneurial, take-charge attitude.
F. Create a Strong Presence
A comprehensive approach to impressing your manager or team leader and other
key people is to create a strong presence, keeping yourself in the forefront. Get
involved in high visibility projects such as launching a new product. Joining a
team is effective as is getting involved in community activities of interest to top
management. Also, take on tasks your manager dislikes.
G. Find Out What Your Manager Expects of You
situations.
I. Avoid Bypassing Your Manager
A good way to embarrass and sometimes infuriate your manager is to repeatedly
go to his or her superior with your problems, conflict, and complaints. The bypass
suggests that you don’t think your boss has enough power to take care of the
problem, and that you distrust his or her judgment. Bypassing your manager is
looked upon so negatively that most experienced managers will not listen to your
problem unless you have already discussed it with your immediate superior.
J. Engage in Favorable Interaction with Your Manager
Human Relations Self-Assessment Quiz 9-1 presents specific ideas for getting
along well with the manager. An effective way of ingratiating yourself to your
boss and others is to make effective use of humor. Ingratiating is an attempt to
increase one’s attractiveness to others, so as to influence their behavior.
1. Delivering Bad News. Despite the quest for favorable interactions, at times
2. Cross-Cultural Factors. Cultural factors could influence how a given tactic
should be modified for best effectiveness. For example, a manager from
China might expect more respect than a manager from the United States.
II. COPING WITH A PROBLEM MANAGER
A challenge to ambitious people is to cope with a difficult manager, yet remain
well regarded by that person. The problem is sometimes attributed to the boss’s
personality or incompetence. A frequent personality problem is the bully—a cruel
and aggressive boss who intimidates and verbally abuses subordinates. Several
constructive for dealing with a problem manager follow.
A. Reevaluate Your Manager
Some problem bosses are not really a problem. Instead, they have been
misperceived by one or more group members. You and your boss may simply
have a difference in roles, goals, or values. When evaluating your manager,
judge slowly and fairly.
B. Confront Your Manager about the Problem
A general-purpose way of dealing with a problem manager is confront the
problem, and then look for a solution. Use considerable tact and sensitivity
because your manager or team leader has more formal authority than you.
Gently ask for an explanation of the problem. Confrontation can also be
helpful in dealing with the problem of micromanagement, the close
monitoring of most aspects of group member activities by the manager. In
general, your confrontation should reflect a concern about performing well,
not a need to strike back at your manager.
C. Over respond to the Manager’s Pet Peeves
If your boss has a pet peeve, cater to that demand. Do an honest job of staying
on top of any task that your boss deems to be extra important.
D. Learn from Your Manager’s Mistakes
Even a bad boss contributes to our development—he or she serves as a model
of what not to do as a boss. Also, should your manager be fired, analyze that
situation to avoid the mistakes he or she made.
Have students visit the USA Today website for an article on Inferior Superiors:
Coping with an Unprofessional Boss at
http://www.usatoday.com/money/jobcenter/workplace/relationships/2002-11-11-
unprofessional-boss_x.htm or for Four Strategies for Handling a Problem Boss at
http://www.usatoday.com/money/jobcenter/workplace/relationships/2002-11-11-
problem-boss_x.htm
III. BUILDING GOOD COWORKER RELATIONSHIPS
Developing positive relationships with coworkers is a challenge for many
workers. If you are unable to work cooperatively with others, it will be difficult to
hold on to your job. Poor relationships with coworkers can lead to frustration,
stress, and decreased productivity, whereas getting along with them makes the
workplace more satisfying. You need their cooperation and they need yours.
Building good coworker relationships is also important for becoming part of the
in-crowd.
A. Have High Self-Esteem and Be at the Center of a Communication Network
A study with healthcare employees found that having a high core self-
evaluations score (self-esteem included) and being at the center of a
communications was related to popularity. The more popular employees also
received more citizenship behavior from coworkers, and less incidences of
make you stand out because many people believe that crude, rude, and
obnoxious behavior has become a national problem. Closely related to being
civil is to maintain a positive outlook.
C. Make Other People Feel Important
A fundamental principle of fostering good relationships with coworkers and
others is to make them feel important. The tactic is honest because everybody
has a contribution to make. Human Relations Self-Assessment Quiz 9-3
presents some behavioral specifics on making others feel important.
D. Maintain Honest and Open Relationships
In human relations we attach considerable importance to maintaining honest
team player is one who emphasizes group accomplishments and cooperation
rather than individual achievement and not helping others. Engaging in the
following behaviors will help you to be perceived as a team player:
2. Display a helpful, cooperative attitude.
3. To establish trust, keep confidential information private and give honest
opinions.
4. Share information and opinions with coworkers.
5. Provide emotional support to coworkers.
6. Follow the Golden Rule.
7. Avoid actions that could sabotage or undermine the group in any way.
8. Attend company-sponsored social events.
9. Avoid backstabbing. (A special category of disliked behavior is
backstabbing, an attempt to discredit another person by underhanded
means such as innuendo, accusation, or the like.)
F. Follow Groups Standards of Conduct
To be a good coworker, one has to adhere to group norms, the unwritten set
of expectations for group members—what people ought to do. Yet
firm that guide people’s actions. Group norms also influence the social aspects
of behavior on the job.
A confusing aspect of group norms for many people is how much physical
contract of a friendly, nonsexual nature is acceptable and desirable in a given
workplace. Preferences of coworkers and status factors influence the amount
and type of touching that is acceptable.
It is important to be a good team player, but to advance in your career you
must find a way to distinguish yourself, such as through creative thinking and
outstanding performance
perceived as insincere. Another good method of cultivating coworkers is to
give them recognition for their accomplishments.
I. Face Maturely the Challenge of the Office Romance
More romances begin on the job than through the Internet. People often work
closely in teams and other joint projects, thus creating conditions for the office
romance to take place. Also, familiarity builds emotional and physical
attraction.
1. Company Policies about Office Romances. To help deal with the potential
negative aspects of office romance, some companies have established
policies covering such relationships, including written agreements (a love
contract). Both parties must mutually and voluntarily consent to the
relationship. The policy states that the social relationship must not affect job
performance or negatively impact the company’s business.
2. Be Discreet with the Office Romance. Do not abuse tolerance of the
coworker romance. No nonessential business trips together, no public
displays of affection. Discretion is better than excluding all possible office
romances because some office romances wind up as permanent
relationships.
IV. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONSHIPS WITH CUSTOMERS
Business success is built on good relationships. An employee whose thoughts and
actions are geared toward helping customers has a customer service orientation.
Good service is the primary factor that keeps customers coming back. Profits
jump considerably as the customer is retained over time.
An overall approach to dealing effectively with customers is to be a good
organizational citizen with respect to customer relationships. See Figure 9-3 for a
list of Service-Oriented Organizational Citizenship Behaviors. Suggestions for
achieving high-level customer service are as follows:
1. Establish customer satisfaction goals.
2. Engage in proactive customer service performance.
3. Strive for the “wow” experience
4. Understand your customer’s needs and place them first..
5. Show care and concern.
6. Communicate a positive attitude.
7. Make the buyer feel good.
8. Be helpful rather than defensive when a customer complains.
9. Invite the customer back.
10. Avoid rudeness. (Refer to Self-Assessment Quiz 9-4, Am I Being Rude?)
12. Keep electronic communications professional and polite.
13. Speak to the customer in his or her preferred language even if you can
speak in his or her native language.
In short, good customer service stems naturally from practicing good human
relations.
9.1 If team leaders don’t have as much power as a regular manager, why is it still
important to build a good relationship with your team leader?
9.2 How can a worker implement the tactic, “engage in favorable interactions with
your manager” without appearing to be “kissing up” to the boss?
9.3 Give an example of a Facebook post or Tweet a person could write that would
make a coworker feel important.
9.4 Suppose a coworker apparently dislikes you. Explain which techniques described
in this chapter you think would be the most effective in building a positive
9.5 Provide an example of a group standard of conduct in any place you have
worked. What led you to conclude that the particular behavior was a group
standard of conduct?
9.6 What would be an example of an appropriate compliment you might deliver to a
coworker who made a suggestion that saved the company $1 million annually in
shipping costs?
9.7 If rudeness is so widespread today, why bother being polite and considerate on the
job?
9.8 Considering that consumers post a lot of crazy comments on social networking
sites, why should company management be concerned about these posts?
9.9 Visualize yourself as the manager of a hotel, and two of the guests checking in are
celebrating their sixtieth wedding anniversary. How might you and your staff
deliver the “wow” experience to these guests?
9.10 Ask a person who has achieved job success what he or she thinks are two
important ways of getting along with coworkers and customers. Compare notes
with classmates.
We suspect the students will receive sound advice about practicing good human
relations such as listening to others, paying them compliments, and recognizing
their efforts. Comments about getting along with customers are likely to
emphasize providing exceptional service.
COMMENTS ON EXERCISES AND CASES
Human Relations Self-Assessment Quiz 9.1: Manager Interaction Checklist
The interaction checklist provides students with behavioral specifics for forming
favorable interactions with their present or future manager. A worthwhile line of
discussion is how these items relate to office politics and being a sycophant. The
checklist also raises the questions of values. Which activities on this checklist does the
student perceive to fit his or her values? A good example is statement 13: “Almost
never complain about work or personal life to my manager.” Some students would
perceive such behavior to be a natural and comfortable approach to developing a good
relationship with the boss. Others might think that complaints are often justified and
should not be held back.
Human Relations Self-Assessment Quiz 9-2: The Civil Behavior Checklist
It is conceivable that a student who scores 7 or below on this scale would be triggered
into figuring out how to become move civil toward work associates. If so, The Civil
Behavior Checklist will have attained its purpose. It is also possible that students who
score 8 or more points will feel encouraged to continue their civil behavior.
Human Relations Self-Assessment Quiz 9-3: How Important Do I Make People Feel?
A potential value of this self-quiz is that it raises consciousness about the importance of
making others feel important. Many people have never given this topic much thought.
Popularizers of human relations, particularly Dale Carnegie, have emphasized the
contribution of making others feel important to good human relations. Many successful
leaders have developed their skill in remembering the names of hundreds of people.
When meeting people a second or third time, the leader repeats the name making the
person remembered feel important.
For some people, making others feel important is difficult because their natural
tendency is to devalue others, and attempt to make them feel unimportant. Expressions
like, “You put your pants on one leg at a time also” make others feel unimportant.
Human Relations Self-Assessment 9-4: Am I Being Rude?
A rudeness survey is particularly useful because so many people are rude without
realizing that their behavior would be interpreted by many as rudeness, such as
statement No. 7 about not maintaining eye contact with customers. Statement No. 2
about talking on the phone while serving a customer warrants class discussion because
the practice has become so widespread among customer-contact workers. Customers
are also quite rude to customer-contact workers, and this topic merits a brief collateral
discussion.
Applying Human Relations Exercise 9-1: Giving Good Customer Service
An important take-away from this and similar role-plays is that it is easier to read about
and understand human relations techniques than to implement them. It is usually
worthwhile to run the role-play twice, with different players each time. The
comparisons between the different sets of role players can be valuable.
An example of providing the Wow experience for scenario 1 might be to offer to buy
The evaluation forms associated with these role plays should provide some useful
diagnostic information yet they are not complex enough to be perceived as busywork.
Evaluating the customers is also helpful because, as mentioned above, many customers
neglect the feelings of customer service workers.
Applying Human Relations Exercise 9-2: The Thirty-Second Elevator Speech
The student is required to both make a quantitative rating and provide a few words
about the strengths and weaknesses of the presentation.
A 30-second presentation can also be useful during a job search—particularly should
the opportunity arise to speak to a hiring official over the telephone. Also, a written 30-
second presentation can be useful for a cover letter to accompany a job résumé.
Human Relations Class Activity: How We Got In Good with the Boss
The experience sharing contained in this exercise can produce some valuable insights into
developing a good relationship with the boss. In addition to the questions asked, it is
helpful to observe whether some tactics are too superficial or too blatant to do much
good. One example that frequently surfaces is “Bring the boss back coffee when I return
9.11 How effective do you think Leah’s initiatives are in helping her develop a
reputation as a strong team player?
9.12. If you were Leah’s supervisor how would you react to the e-mails she sent to the
group?
9.13. What advice would you offer Lean to help her advance her reputation as a team
player?
Leah is taking useful initiatives to be a good team player, but she might have to be
more subtle. Leah should also consider some of the guidelines for contributing to
both the interpersonal and task aspects of team play covered in this chapter. Two
of many examples would be finding ways to recognize the interests and
achievements of others, and helping team members do their jobs better.
Human Relations Role-Playing Exercise: Cecilia Objects to Leah’s Teamwork Tactics
An important feature of this role play is that it gives the role players and opportunity to
resolve moderate-intensity conflict with a coworker. A point worth observing is whether
Cecilia and Leah reach an agreement.
Human Relations Case Study 9-2: How Far Should Tom Go to Keep His Client Happy?
9.14 To what extent is Tom neglecting the idea that client needs come first and that his
goal is to please the client?
9.15 Should Tom be direct with Deborah and tell her that she is consuming too much
time for the amount of business the hospital is giving his firm?
9.16 What advice might you offer Tom to maintain a good relationship with Deborah
without the relationship being too disruptive to his own work schedule?
1. Break students into teams of 3-5 people, and present the following scenario to
them:
You and your team have just found a lamp. You rub it, and surprise! A genie
appears. The genie grants you three wishes. You are allowed to make three
changes at work. You may change your boss, your coworkers, customers, or
yourself.
2. Give each team a piece of flipchart paper and markers. Have them design a wish
list for their genie.
3. After the lists are completed, have the groups go back and categorize their wishes
into those related to management, coworkers, customers, and themselves.
4. Have the teams identify ways they can make their wishes for the workplace come
true without a magic genie.
5. Have teams report out and debrief.