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Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-44
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Using Conflict Assessment Tools
Divide the class into six groups and have them be prepared to summarize the key ideas of each of
the following sections of the text:
System’s Theory
Metaphoric/Dramatic Analysis
Coalitions
Conflict Triangles
Micro-events
Wilmot-Hocker Conflict Assessment Guide
Give student about fifteen minutes to figure out how to explain the key ideas in their section to
the rest of the class. Listen to reports from the groups and be sure to clarify/correct anything that
is less than accurate.
Following the reports, distribute one of the three cases* that follow to each group. Each group
should use the tool or approach on which they just reported to assess the case study. Let students
know that they will be expected to explain their responses to the questions listed at the bottom of
each case as well as the case itself.
Discussion Questions
After the reports of the cases and approaches, consider the following additional discussion
questions:
• What are the various patterns you can observe?
• Which seem easiest to you? Why?
• Which patterns seem to be difficult to explore and express? Why?
• What are some of the reasons for using multiple assessments in the conflict?
• How does the process of assessing conflicts in these ways reduce the bias of interpretation of
conflict?
• How might assessing your own conflicts in these ways be different from assessing someone
else’s conflict?
• To what extent is bias a concern when you are in a conflict and also doing the assessing?
• What might happen to perceptions of power or conflict styles if you are the one to initiate the
assessment process? What conclusions would you make about future courses of action?
*The following cases may also be used effectively in the chapter on Third Party Intervention
(Chapter 9). You may find it useful to withhold telling students the outcomes of each of the
cases until you have discussed them in terms of the approaches to management or resolution later
in the term.
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-45
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Case #1: Family Problems
In this case, three adult siblings are involved in a dispute over the distribution of property
following the death of their remaining parent. The middle child, Delores, had been named the
executor of her parent’s estate, but chose not to do anything other than what was required by law
at her father’s death. According to the will, the estate was to be evenly divided between the
surviving children. However, this has not yet occurred. As time went on (a couple of years)
Delores’ older sister Jane took several large pieces of furniture from her parent’s home and gave
them to her children. The younger brother, Ernie wanted to make other investments that would
require the sale of the parent’s property. He also wanted to make sure that part of his parent’s
estate would be available to pass on to his children.
Other Relevant Information
• Delores never married and has no children.
• The siblings have another sister, Penny, who was killed in a car accident many years ago.
Penny was survived by an estranged spouse and four children.
• Jane’s reasoning abilities are hampered by a brain injury incurred in her late teens.
• Jane and her spouse live in California and visit for extended periods of time at least twice a
year. Jane typically stays at her late parent’s home.
• Delores and Ernie live in Washington.
• Delores and Ernie’s family have generally gotten along well up to the death of their father.
• Ernie and Jane have not agreed on much of anything since Ernie married someone Jane did
not approve of for him.
• Ernie and Jane had a further falling out when Jane said that Ernie’s wife would not be able to
participate in their father’s funeral and that Ernie’s daughter had told him about Jane’s
comment.
• Delores and Ernie and Jane all agreed in principle at least that Penny’s children should be
included in the distribution of property when and if it should occur.
Questions
1. What are the features of the conflict that are most important given your assessment strategy
or tool?
2. How would you characterize the conflict from your assigned perspective?
3. What additional information would you need to make a more complete assessment of this
conflict from the perspective your group has been assigned?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-46
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Case #2: Child Custody Dispute
Tracy and John had been married eight years and had two children together, Sarah, age six, and
Matt, age 4. Tracy was attending law school in Tacoma and both children were enrolled in
preschool there. John worked for the state in Olympia. The family lived in Tacoma. John and
Tracy seemed like the idyllic parents of an idyllic family. Then Tracy left John for one of her
law school professors and argued for custody of their two children. In addition to the shock of
the pending divorce, and the potential loss of his children, John was in shock that the professor
Tracy left him for was a woman.
Other Relevant Information
• During the marriage, Tracy was the primary child care provider.
• Tracy says that John was so busy with his work that he did not pay much attention to the
children and their needs.
• John is a very proud man and feels his masculinity threatened as his wife leaves him for
another woman.
• The children are confused by the break up of their family.
• John does not want the children to be exposed to the lesbian relationship of their mother. He
believes that it is a passing phase and that although he and Tracy are not likely to reunite, the
relationship Tracy has with Katie will not last.
• John asserts that he wants full custody of the children and that Tracy can only have visitation
rights separate from Katie.
• Tracy asserts that she should have custody of the children because she has cared for them all
along—her relational status has nothing to do with the raising of her children.
• Although she does not speak highly of John to other adults, she is not willing to disparage
him in front of the children. She believes that the children should have continued contact
with him because he is their father.
• Sarah and Matt have not expressed a preference of parent to their child care providers and
seem to be handling the break- up of their parents as well as could be expected.
Questions
1. What are the features of the conflict that are most important given your assessment strategy
or tool?
2. How would you characterize the conflict from your assigned perspective?
3. What additional information would you need to make a more complete assessment of this
conflict from the perspective your group has been assigned?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-47
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Case #3: Fraternity Rivalry
The rivalry between two campus fraternities has shifted from “friendly” to malicious. The
houses are located next door to one another and several physical fights have been reported
between the members in the last several months. Most recently, members of one house, XXX,
entered the house of YYY around two o’clock in the morning and stole composite photos, the
YYY charter, and other significant fraternity property from the walls and distributed it around
the lawns of the other fraternities in the area. Some of the material was never recovered
(including the charter) and that which was recovered and returned was water damaged.
Members of XXX have been charged with violations of the student conduct code and formal
charges of theft may be filed by members of YYY’s alumni.
Other Relevant Information
• XXX are considered to be the “bad boys” of the Greek system—the local “Animal House.”
• YYY are perceived as the “goodie two shoes” of the system.
• YYY members serve as the student body president, editor-in-chief of the school paper,
president of the Inter-Fraternity Council (IFC), and hold many senate seats in the student
council.
• XXX alumni were involved in the “raid” on YYY.
• XXX continues to be on probation and other sanctions imposed by IFC for violations of Rush
procedures and alcohol policy violations.
• XXX is under the watchful eye of the university administration and is often used as an
example by the administration for the reduction of the Greek system on campus.
• YYY has been working with the administration to preserve and strengthen the Greek system
on campus, but feels as if they are making little headway.
• YYY had a large Rush this year.
• XXX had a very small Rush and is at risk of losing their house for insufficient numbers of
inhabitants.
Questions
1. What are the features of the conflict that are most important given your assessment strategy
or tool?
2. How would you characterize the conflict from your assigned perspective?
3. What additional information would you need to make a more complete assessment of this
conflict from the perspective your group has been assigned?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-48
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Actual Outcomes of the Cases Studies
Case #1 has not gone to mediation or litigation. No overt action has taken place and there is no
resolution after fifteen years. Jane has since died and her husband has remarried. Delores’
health has declined and Ernie has moved out of state.
Case #2 went to litigation. Tracy and John have joint custody of the children. Tracy and Katie
are still together after five years. The children love Katie as they do their father and mother.
Tracy is not happy with the way John raises the children when they are with him. He dates often
and the children are left out of his life. She also does not agree with his parenting style,
particularly with regard to manners and discipline. Tracy and Katie are considering returning to
court for a petition of full custody of the children with visitation rights only for John.
Case #3 went to mediated dispute. The parties agreed to mediation as well as formal university
procedures. Members of each fraternity meet weekly with a mediator following individual visits
to the houses by the mediator. A sense of cooperation and collaboration emerged and some
members of the “offending” house came clean about their role in the process and offered
personal apologies to members of the other house. Focusing on the overall goal of positive
fraternity relationships and standing on campus, the “good guys” offered to help the “party
animals” develop their RUSH and they agreed to coordinate joint events between the houses that
would include sororities (so the competition between the houses would be moderated by the
presence of women) to help rebuild the sense of positive rivalry that had been an important part
of their history.
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-49
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Chapter 8: Interpersonal Negotiation
Activities and Discussion Questions
Dialogue: The Wedding Fight
Overview
This sample conversation, “The Wedding Fight” can be used for at least four activities (listed
below). However, as an instructor, you may want to use the dialogue in other chapters to
highlight additional concepts.
Process
Distribute a copy of the dialogue to students, read it aloud and/or assign groups to analyze the
conflict. Ask students to write down comments as you read it. Then, use one or more of the
following four tools for analysis that appear after the dialogue: (1) discussion questions
highlighting relevant terms from Chapter 7; (2) William Wilmot’s “Guide for Handling Your
Anger;” (3) Wilmot’s “Guide for Handling Others’ Anger;” and (4) Wilmot’s “How to Bring Up
Issues Constructively.”
“The Wedding Fight”
Background
Kyle and Kelly have been dating for three years. They’ve recently become engaged and are
planning their upcoming wedding (1 month away).
Kelly: Hey, guess what. We got our invitations today. We can write
up our final list and mail them out this weekend.
Kyle: I thought you were doing that.
Kelly: You thought I was doing that? You always say you’re going to
help, but when it actually comes down to it, you don’t. Or should I
say won’t.
Kyle: You know it’s finals, and I have to study. I just don’t have
the time.
Kelly: So what do you think I’ve been doing, sitting on my backside?
Besides, since when did YOU decide to become a serious student?
Kyle: (under his breath) Here we go again. More like my mother every
day.
Kelly: Why don’t you say it loud enough so I can hear it? What
exactly is that supposed to mean anyway? Maybe I wouldn’t have to act
like your mother if you didn’t act like such a child!
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-50
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Kyle: Well, somebody’s gotta relax around here. You’re so uptight,
and I don’t just mean about the wedding invitations.
Kelly: What do you mean, uptight?
Kyle: Cold, totally disconnected.
Kelly: How am I cold?
Kyle: Like it takes a genius to figure it out.
Kelly: You don’t care about this wedding at all. Do you even care
about me at all?
Kyle: That’s ridiculous. You’re right—-I couldn’t care less about the
wedding. It’s the wedding night I’m worried about.
Kelly: Oh my God, I can’t believe this is about sex. I’m talking
invitations and you’re talking sex. That’s all you care about. Well,
sex and football. I don’t know if I’m madder about the wedding or the
stupid football games we go to every single week, Mr. Serious College
Student. You have plenty of time for that.
Kyle: What do you mean—We haven’t gone the last two weekends because
of all this wedding planning.
Kelly: (sarcastically) Well, aren’t you the perfect martyr. You’ve
given up so much for me. I’m impressed!
Kyle: (exasperated, but resigned) You know what—just tell me what to
do and I’ll do it. I’ll write the stupid invitations.
Kelly: You could start by picking out your tux.
Kyle. I did. You didn’t like it. Big shocker there.
Kelly: What do you expect me to say about a white tux—nobody wears
white tuxes anymore.
Kyle: Well, I like it, and that’s what I’m going to wear.
Kelly: Oh, come on. You’re not really going to wear that. Even your
Mom said you should wear something more serious. Black would be
better.
Kyle: Are we planning for a wedding, or a funeral?
Discussion Questions
When finished, ask students to analyze the conflict according to the questions below. Have
students work in dyads or small groups. Share their analyses with one another. Have one person
from each group report back to the larger group. Facilitate the class discussion, incorporating as
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-51
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
many student responses as possible. Incorporate text terminology and clarify questions as much
as possible.
1. Discuss the role of anger in this conversation.
a. Evaluate Kelly’s expression of anger. How could she have expressed her anger more
effectively?
b. Evaluate Kyle’s reception of Kelly’s anger. Describe strategies Kyle could have used
to manage the conflict more productively?
2. Identify the “rules” in this conversation/relationship. According to Shimanoff’s format, write
at least two rules you think Kyle and Kelly should formulate for future conflicts.
3. Give one example of how you could help either person reframe her or his interpretation of
the other.
4. Describe and briefly illustrate two principles of interpersonal nonviolence that Kelly and
Kyle could have used to personally intervene in their conflict.
Wrap-Up
Identify strategies for managing anger effectively (actions both Kelly and Kyle might take to
better manage the other person’s anger). Then discuss potential obstacles for achieving those
goals. At the end of the discussion, ask students to assess the usefulness of these tools in really
heated conflicts. Real-life conflict isn’t always as easy as the “lists” make it seem to be, and the
students may want to discuss this.
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-52
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Bringing Up Issues Constructively
William Wilmot, Collaboration Institute
Once in a while, someone’s behavior may bother us. In the workplace, we may feel offended,
interfered with or not included. Here are some guidelines for how to bring up issues in a way
that will have a positive outcome.
Guidelines for the person who puts issues on the table
1. Prepare yourself
• Bring up issues only if you are willing to become more involved with the person.
• It works best if you have a good relationship with the other.
• Be sensitive to keeping the relationship healthy.
• Plan so that you use good timing and an appropriate place.
2. Use positive language
• State your concerns as suggestions or requests rather than demands.
• Speak about specific behaviors rather than what you think are the other person’s
motives. In that way, you separate the person from his behavior.
• Focus on the other’s behavior–what he or she did or said.
• Keep the conversation positive and constructive.
• Be direct and don’t talk too much.
• Be sure to state facts as facts, ideas as ideas, guesses as guesses, and feelings
as feelings.
• Be sensitive to the effect of your words on the other person.
Guidelines for the person who is responding
• Take a deep breath and listen carefully.
• Take a moment to realize that this is an opportunity for you to better understand
how your own words and actions are experienced by another person.
• Realize that you may be uncomfortable and somewhat disorganized during this
conversation.
• Try to hear this confrontation as constructive criticism of your words and
actions, not a putdown of who you are.
Questions
1. Which of these suggestions could Kelly and Kyle use to manage their issues? Write
sample dialogue for what they might say, as alternatives to what they did say.
2. Use these suggestions to construct a scenario and sample conversation for bringing up an
important issue to someone in your personal or professional life.
Family Meetings: Another Way to Manage Conflict
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-53
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Overview
Often, students can find useful tips for managing conflicts in the workplace. However, when
significant issues arise in their families, they often have difficulty applying conflict principles.
One way to manage family conflict is to address it with an approach used in the workplace.
More specifically, employees often call meetings to discuss important policies, procedures or
productivity. This activity allows students the opportunity to use a similar process with their
families.
Process
Ask students to write about a current or past family conflict. They can work in dyads or groups
of 3-4 to complete the following:
a. Describe what a meeting in the workplace looks like.
i. Setting
ii. Reasons/issues
iii. Attendees
iv. Timing
v. Agenda
vi. Rules/norms
vii. Action steps
b. Compare and contrast a workplace meeting to a family meeting. What issues might be
similar? Different? What role will your emotions play in a family meeting? How are
your conflict styles similar or different than in the workplace?
c. Construct a process for a family meeting.
i. Setting
ii. Reasons/issues
iii. Attendees
iv. Timing
v. Agenda
vi. Rules/norms
d. Ask students to construct specific messages for specific contexts. Ask their partners
and/or group members to provide feedback. You may have them role-play the actual
scenarios, to help them prepare for the “real” situation. (This will depend upon the
comfort level of the students.)
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-54
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Principled Negotiation in Action*
Overview
As the completion of the term approaches, you may be willing to put Principled Negotiation to
the test in your classroom. Students often feel the burden of extra course work at the end of the
term, and if you already have a large group or individual assignments due at the end of the term,
they may be vocal about their concerns regarding a final exam. One way to show how Principled
Negotiation can really work–and to have them come to understand it from the inside out, is to
have the students work on an actual issue of great importance to them. This activity suggests
that you negotiate with them about the format and structure of their final exam.
Process
First: Solicit feedback from students about the pressures they may or may not be feeling about
the end of the term. Allow them to talk about their other class loads, work, and the rest of their
life how it impacts their work in your class. Ask students to write a couple of sentences about
what they WISH would happen for the final exam in this course. Collect and read the
suggestions.
Next: Review materials on negotiation and bargaining and indicate that you are willing to
engage with them in a negotiation about the final if they are willing to adhere to the guidelines of
Principled Negotiation identified in the text.
Review the four basic principles and the steps associated with Principled Negotiation. You may
want to distribute the attached handout.
Divide the class into groups and ask them to assess the interests and positions of the parties to the
negotiation.
Questions
• What is the problem to be addressed? Format? Investment of time?
• What are your interests? My interests?
• Invent options for mutual gain—suggestions?
• Insist on objective criteria—how will we know if it is a good decision?
• What are your goals?
• What are your interests?
• How are they varied among the student constituents?
• What are my goals?
• What are my interests?
• How can we creatively meet the goals and interests—even though they are varied?
• What would it be like if we had a third party intervene to help with the decision?
Encourage each group to bring a possible solution to the table. Each group should select a
spokesperson for their views and serve as an advocate for their position.
At the Table: Sit down in front of the class (or in the middle if you can change the format of the
room) with the negotiators from each group. Encourage the class members not at the table to
gather around and to take notes on their observations of the negotiation process. Open the
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-55
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
conversation with your students about the ways that imbalances of power are in play in this
negotiation, and discuss with them the extent to which you are open to being persuaded and the
extent to which you will retain the right to alter the outcome unilaterally (not a good idea if you
really want them to engage in the process).
If you have a short class, you may decide to have the fishbowl negotiation in another class
period. In that case, collect and review the proposals from the teams and make copies so that
each team will have the opportunity to review them before the next meeting. You may choose to
have a couple of students serve as facilitators of the discussion rather than facilitating it yourself
to help balance the power.
Debriefing and Applying: Be sure to spend time following the completion of your negotiated
agreement to debrief the process.
Ask the observers to respond to the following set of questions first, then encourage the
“negotiators” to contribute to the conversation.
• To what extent were the interests of each party met?
• How did positions change over the course of the negotiation?
• What kinds of creative solutions were generated? Who introduced them? Does that
matter?
• What are the objective criteria by which we can evaluate the effectiveness of this
negotiated agreement?
• What would be different if you tried to have this kind of negotiation in another context?
How might you take what you have learned in this experience and apply it elsewhere?
*Julie’s Notes: I’ve also successfully used this process in the first week of class regarding an
Attendance Policy, but I didn’t reveal what it’s called until the activity was completed. Then,
later, when you study it in class, you can refer back to the process and try it again with the final
exam. ….or you could just do it once (either time).
Primary Challenge: If you really want this process to work as it’s designed, as the instructor,
you must be ABSOLUTELY clear about what you need/want regarding content (final exam or
attendance policy). Additionally, you MUST be truly open to hearing what the students have to
say and be willing to change if necessary. It’s great fun, shows flexibility on your part, shows
you don’t have to use all the power you have (course concept) and serves as a great reminder as
to whether or not you can practice what you teach!!! ☺
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-56
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Chapter 9: Third Party Intervention
Activities and Discussion Questions
The Gift
Use the following scenario to help assess interests and positions when negotiating in everyday
life. Make two lists on the board—one for interests and one for positions. Ask students to divide
into groups—one group for each party to the conflict. Have each group identify the possible
interests of their party and distinguish them from the potential positions their person might take.
Scenario
Larry, a 26-year-old man, and his fiancée, Joan, visit his parents for Christmas. Larry’s parents,
Jack and Alice, have met Joan before and like her very much. Generally it is a positive situation
all around. During dinner Jack announces, "We have a big gift for you this Christmas." He
continues, "We want to entrust the business to you, Larry and Joan, and have you move to
Billings and run it." Larry, gasping for air, says, "Oh, uh, thanks." Joan says, "I don't think that
would work well for the two of us." Alice says, "More pie Larry?” and "Joan, would you like
some more turkey?" Alice continues to fill the silence with, "Jack, what do you think about this
new gravy?"
The typical patterns for each person are:
• Larry generally avoids conflict and likes his parents.
• Joan is younger than Larry, and wants to find meaningful work on her own.
• Jack is forceful and used to people going along with his ideas.
• Alice avoids conflict and deflects it when it arises between others.
Questions
1. What are the different positions? Interests?
2. How might the parties perceive that their goals are incompatible?
3. How might others be perceived as interfering in the accomplishment of their goals?
4. What are some suggestions you’d make to help this family discuss the ramifications of the
gift of the family business?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-57
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manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Leveling the Playing Field
The authors of this text make the claim that equalizing power is not always possible. They also
describe that in the attempt to balance power, individuals can choose between some very
destructive strategies and others that are more constructive.
Provide the students with a current case in the local, national, or international news in which
there is a clear imbalance of power. Have them respond to the following questions, then
brainstorm lists of the destructive and constructive options available to the parties in conflict.
1. Who are the parties to this conflict?
2. What are the power currencies that are or seem to be available to each party?
3. How do power imbalances manifest in the communication between and among the
parties?
Destructive Balance Options Constructive Balance Options
• Have students brainstorm lists of options for balancing power.
• After you have a substantial list, have students indicate which options belong to which
party to the conflict.
• What are the ways in which the person or group who seems to be in a higher power
position can facilitate cooperation over competition?
• In what context(s) should one or more of the parties remove themselves from the
situation rather than attempt to balance or tip the scales?
Activities and Discussion Questions
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manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Informal Interventions
Option 1
Have students develop short role-plays based on their real life experiences in which they have
either felt compelled to intervene, been asked to intervene, or would rather sleep with snakes
than intervene in a conflict.
Have the students present their role-plays and then ask the class how they would determine
whether it is appropriate to intervene in the conflict and if so, how they might go about it.
Use the below discussion questions as the conversation about personal intervention develops.
Questions for Discussion
1. In what circumstances is it appropriate to intervene personally?
2. When should you back out gracefully?
3. In what contexts might you suggest some other form of third-party intervention?
4. How would you go about offering the suggestion that they seek a more formal form of third-
party intervention?
5. To what extend does your relationship(s) with one or more of the parties influence your
decision about intervening?
Option 2: Coaching
Have students write about a current conflict—one that still needs management. If students can’t
think of any of their own, you might allow them to write about a friend, etc., as long as the
person is not identified.
Conduct a READ-AROUND. Have each student pass the written version of their conflict to the
person sitting next to her/him. Do this once or twice, so a few people have read each person’s
conflict. Next, assign “coaches” to each conflict, assuring that no one has her/his original
conflict.
Pair coaches up with the conflict parties. Coaches, using the guidelines from chapter 8 (pp. 277-
8), concepts from other chapters and/or personal experience, provide “advice” to help their
partners. You can do this as many times as time will allow. As the instructor, feel free to jump
in with one of your conflicts—Students have a BLAST trying to give you advice for your
conflicts!
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-59
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Transforming Old to New
Overview
Transforming a conflict involves making something new out of something old—ideally
something that is desirable for all parties involved. To help students think about creatively
engaging in the process of transformation, begin with a fun activity that transforms old stuff into
something new.
Process
Divide the class into teams and provide all but one team with a bag of old stuff (could be things
in your office you’d like to get rid of, materials from the recycle bin, stuff laying around at
home, etc.) You can also assign the students to bring in something they do not want anymore
and are willing to donate to a class project.
On a table, provide some materials that may help the teams transform the old into something new
(scissors, duct tape, a stapler, tools, etc.) It helps if there are not enough tools to go around.
The teams with the materials will negotiate together to transform the discarded materials to
create something new.
The team without materials will be the judging team. Their responsibility is to assess and judge
the transformation products of the teams. While the transformation teams are working on their
products, the judging team is to determine their judging criteria, decide if there will be winners
and losers, etc. The judges may decide to observe and evaluate the process as well as the
product. The judges may decide to share their judging criteria with the teams or to tell them after
the projects have been evaluated.
Discussion Questions
1. What was it like to work together to transform something(s) old into something new?
2. How did you decide to go about your process?
3. What do you think of the judgments passed on your product?
4. What was it like to have to judge the transformations?
5. How is this likely to be similar or different from transforming conflicts?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-60
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
Transforming Conflicts
Overview
The purpose of this activity is to have the students determine what form of intervention they
believe is most appropriate for transforming real-life conflicts.
Process
Divide the class into groups and distribute copies of the three cases used in Chapter 7 (Family
Problems, Child Custody Dispute, and Fraternity Rivalry) to each group. Give the groups the
instructions that appear on the next page.
You may choose to give each group a single conflict to address rather than all three.
After the groups have at least twenty minutes to work through the conflicts, ask for oral reports
on the highlights of their conversations. Record them on the board or flip chart so everyone can
see and hear any emergent patterns. Discuss similarities and differences in the approaches taken
by different groups.
Discussion Questions
After responding to the questions on the next page, you may want to follow-up with some of the
following discussion questions:
1. How did you come to your judgment regarding the most appropriate form of third party
intervention?
2. What are the specific features of this conflict, including the relationships among the parties to
it, that make it most suited to mediation, arbitration, litigation, etc?
3. What difference does imagining yourself as a party to the conflict rather than an intervening
third party to it make in the way you would advocate for transformation?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-61
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
4. Transforming Conflicts: Three Case Studies
(Reference: Case Studies in Ch. 7 in Manual)
As a group, determine what might be the most appropriate choice(s) for transforming these
conflicts, given the set of strategies and perspectives presented in the text. Indicate why you
would recommend each of the choices and give a practical, step-by-step set of procedures.
Who is in the best position to make a difference in the conflict as you understand it? Why?
If you were one of the parties to this conflict what would you do? What effect do you think your
decision would have on the conflict?
If you were brought into intervene in this conflict, what would you do first? In what ways would
you attempt to assist the parties in transforming their own conflict?
Activities and Discussion Questions
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 9e IM-62
© 2014 by McGraw-Hill Education. This is proprietary material solely for authorized instructor use. Not authorized for sale or distribution in any
manner. This document may not be copied, scanned, duplicated, forwarded, distributed, or posted on a website, in whole or part.
So You Want To Be a Mediator?
Process
Students could complete part of this assignment outside of class or you can facilitate the full
exercise in class.
1. Have students read about 2-3 conflicts (either stories from the newspaper, or scenarios they
have written up, or cases from the text) that may be appropriate for mediation.
2. Ask students to research (either on the Web in class or as an overnight assignment) what
training is available for people who want to become mediators.
3. Use the following questions to guide your discussions (small groups, large groups or both):
a. What are the skills necessary to do be a successful mediator?
b. How are you learning and developing those skills in college? In your department?
c. What skills could you use from the rest of the text to help you be a successful mediator?
d. How would you gain professional training regarding mediation?
e. How would you go about gaining practical experience to mediate a conflict?
