Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 10e TB-10 | 1
EXAM QUESTIONS:
Chapter 10
True/False
Multiple Choice Questions
1. When Lisa says to her husband, “You’d make a lousy father,” she is communicating which
type of hurtful message?
a. Accusation
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
b. Advice
c. Evaluation
d. Threat
e. Desire
2. “If you think you are going to walk out on me, I’ll make sure your parents know everything
you did when we were living with them” is an example of what type of hurtful message?
a. Desire
b. Threat
c. Advice
d. Evaluation
e. Accusation
3. Which of the following statements is true of the ancient Hawaiian practice known as
Ho’oponopono?
a. It states that the most effective form of apology requires some sort of accompanying
justification.
b. It reinforces the idea that expedient apologies are more effective than compelled
apologies.
c. It requires conflicting parties to apologize by making a ritual sacrifice of a valued
possession.
d. It recognizes that grievances are often tied together and that one layer of resentment
underlies another.
e. It believes that apologies should be strictly voluntary and that one should never be
asked to make any form of restitution.
4. Jim and Susan are getting a divorce, and they have been going to court to obtain a custody
settlement. Jim suddenly realizes that his fight for the children has more to do with hurting
Susan than with the children’s well-being (they both are good parents to the children). Jim is
portraying which stage in the forgiveness process?
a. The strand of empathy
b. The strand of forbearance
c. The strand of commitment
d. The strand of truth
e. The strand of interaction
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
5. Which of the following is a characteristic of forgiveness?
a. Dismissing or minimizing a situation
b. Excusing the actions or behavior of the other
c. Indifference about justice
d. Acknowledging the truth about what has happened
e. Punishing the transgressor
6. The question “Am I willing to consider forgiveness as an option?” is most closely related to
which of the following stages of forgiveness?
a. Uncovering
b. Work
c. Decision
d. Outcome
e. All of the answers are correct.
7. Sarah has recently been robbed and is leery of leaving her apartment if unnecessary.
According to Layton’s forgiveness process, Sarah is in the midst of which of the following
steps?
a. Injured innocence
b. Obsession
c. Fear
d. Transformation
e. Transcendence
8. A person who is caught up in what has happened to her or him and uses the story to get
sympathy from others may be caught up in the “eddy” of:
a. resentment.
b. victimization.
c. revenge.
d. depression.
e. withdrawal.
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
Hocker: Interpersonal Conflict, 10e TB-10 | 5
Short-Answer/Essay Questions
1. What are the elements that make up the definition of forgiveness?
2. Identify and describe an incident in which you could benefit from the choice to forgive
another person and/or reconcile with her or him. What would keep you from making that
choice?
3. Compare and contrast the features of effective apologies with the three types of problematic or
ineffective apologies.
4. How does an imbalance of power affect forgiveness and reconciliation between a transgressor
and a forgiver?
5. Differentiate between implicit and explicit forms of forgiveness. What role can “gestures”
play in forgiveness?
6. Identify the four “eddies” a person can be stuck in when she or he feels “wronged.” What
7. Your book states that forgiving yourself can be harder than obtaining forgiveness from the
person you hurt. Do you agree or disagree? Explain.
8. Why is receiving forgiveness sometimes difficult? Provide an example for this.