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Discussion Questions
Chapter 13: Hurting the Ones We Love: Relational Transgressions
1. Think about a time when a relational partner was jealous of you having a relationship with someone
else. How did you and those involved communicate the conflict and hurt? Did it better the situation or
make it worse?
2. Under what circumstances, if any, do you think it is okay to deceive a friend or relational partner?
When would you feel betrayed if your friend or partner deceived you?
3. Is it ever appropriate to engage in surveillance of your romantic partner’s social activity? What about
a friend or a family member? What makes it appropriate and where is it inappropriate?
4. Think about times in your life when close relational partners (friends, romantic partners, and family
members) hurt one another. Was there a sense of feeling devalued? How did the experience make you
feel about the relationship?
5. Consider situations of unrequited love, when a person desiring another does not disclose their
romantic feelings to the other person. Have you ever been in a situation like this, and if so, how did the
situation play out?
