Business Communication Chapter 11 Homework Defensiveness And Supportiveness Evaluation Control

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DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Chapter 11: Interpersonal Conflict Management

Chapter Overview

This chapter examines interpersonal conflict, identifies popular myths about it, explains its six

principles, and defines and illustrates its management stages and strategies.

Interpersonal conflict refers to a disagreement between or among connected individuals who

perceive their goals as incompatible. Many myths surround conflict such as: it is best avoided;

it means a relationship is in trouble; conflict damages interpersonal relationships; it is

destructive and will reveal our negative selves; and it must produce a winner and loser.

Six major principles of interpersonal conflict are identified, and suggest that conflict: (1) is

inevitable—you can’t avoid it, (2) can center on content and/or relationship issues, (3) can

occur in all communication forms, (4) can have positive as well as negative effects, (5) is

heavily influenced by gender and culture, and (6) will have significant effects on your

relationship, depending on the conflict style used.

The chapter examines the seven-stage model that is often helpful in managing conflicts: (1)

set the stage—try to fight in private, choose the time to resolve the conflict, and fight about

Chapter Objectives

1. Define interpersonal conflict and identify the popular myths about conflict.

2. Explain the six principles describing the nature of interpersonal conflict.

4. Define and distinguish between the conflict management strategies of win–lose and win–

win approaches, avoiding and fighting actively, defensiveness and supportiveness, face–

attacking and face-enhancing, and verbal aggressiveness and argumentativeness. Learn

to use these strategies constructively.

DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Student Objectives

Content Objectives:

To describe the nature and list the types of interpersonal conflict

To explain the stages of conflict management

To explicate the major strategies for conflict management

Skills Objectives:

To approach interpersonal conflict realistically and positively

Skills Evaluation

1. Objective: To approach interpersonal conflict realistically and positively. Have

students identify common conflict situations. Students should analyze the dynamic of

2. Objective: To approach interpersonal conflict realistically and positively. Students

write analyses of themselves in regard to assertiveness, aggressiveness, and

argumentativeness. They should also include three or four irrational thoughts they have

3. Objective: To manage conflict by moving effectively through its stages. Students

4. Objective: To manage conflict by moving effectively through its stages. List national

problems for students to choose among for a research paper. The paper should include

5. Objective: To engage in interpersonal conflict management using fair, productive,

and proven strategies. Small group teams of students write “before and after” scripts

and/or videotape vignettes that demonstrate desirable and undesirable approaches and

interactions for conflicts. For the “after” dialogue, both parties should take on the role of a

DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Chapter Outline

I. What Is Interpersonal Conflict?

1. Conflict occurs when people are interdependent

3. Conflict occurs when people perceive each other as interfering

B. Myths About Conflict

II. Principles of Interpersonal Conflict

A. Conflict Is Inevitable

B. Conflict Can Center on a Variety of Issues

C. Conflict Can Occur in All Communication Forms

E. Conflict Is Influenced by Culture and Gender

1. Conflict and culture

1. Competing: I win, you lose

3. Accommodating: I lose, you win

5. Compromising: I win and lose, you win and lose

III. Conflict Management Stages

A. Step 1. Set the Stage

B. Step 2. Define the Conflict

C. Step 3. Identify Your Goals

IV. Conflict Management Strategies

A. Win–Lose and Win–Win Strategies

B. Avoidance and Fighting Actively

C. Defensiveness and Supportiveness

1. Evaluation

3. Strategy

5. Superiority

6. Certainty

D. Face-Attacking and Face-Enhancing Strategies: Politeness in Conflict

E. Verbal Aggressiveness and Argumentativeness

2. Argumentativeness

DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Teaching Strategies

 What Have I Got to Lose? Discuss the role of power in conflict. Present a situation in

which the student has little power and much to lose, such as in a conflict with a

 Stopping Conflict Before It Starts. Earlier chapters dealt with numerous

communication skills for dealing with a potential conflict. Students in small groups will

create a list of those techniques (such as active listening and perception checking).

 Uncovering Pseudo-conflict. Use the skills of discussion inherent in the first stage of

conflict resolution to discover and recognize that what appeared to be a conflict is not a

conflict after all. Good problems emanate from polarized thinking. For instance,

 Taking Sides. Walk and talk through a four-sided technique used by children in Japan

called “Pillow Talk.” Present a common situation for conflict, such as between parent

and college-age child about moving to an apartment. Place your hands on one side of

 What Do You Say? Review the “Interpersonal Choice Point” and “Ethical Choice

Points” exercises in the chapter and identify several situations appropriate for

discussion, evaluation, and role-playing.

 Rewriting “You” to “I” Messages. This is a Skill Building Exercise at the end of the

chapter. Have students pair up and rewrite the three examples. Then, have students

DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Activities for Student-Based Learning

What Would You Do?

Ask students to generate past conflict dilemmas they encountered in their lives. Ask each

student to present his or her dilemma to the class. Have students volunteer and share how

Men Versus Women

This activity illustrates the way that men and women perceive conflict. Ask for six volunteers

(three males and three females). Pair up the volunteers so there is a dyad of females, a dyad

of males, and a mixed dyad. Ask the females to pretend they are males fighting over a female

they both like. They need to be as stereotypical as possible. Then, ask the males to pretend

Conflict Depiction in the Media

Have students select a television show or movie that involves conflict. Ask students to find a

particular scene, describe the situation to classmates, and then share snippet of the conflict

DeVito Interpersonal Messages, 4e Instructor’s Manual

Dealing with Conflict—Role-Playing Skills Evaluation Form

Class: _____________________Section: ______________ Date: ___________________

Team: __________________________________________ Skills Evaluation: __________

Student’s Name: _________________________________ Skills Evaluation: __________

(For grade confidentiality, the instructor may use separate forms for each student or may

photocopy the form filling in only one student’s evaluation grade.)

1. “Dangerous Dueling”

Did the team demonstrate unfair and potentially unproductive strategies for dealing with

conflict? Were the dialogue and outcomes plausible?

2. “Cooperative Conflict”

Did the team demonstrate fair, productive, and proven methods for dealing with conflict?

Were the dialogue and outcomes plausible? Did both parties in the conflict show informed

skillfulness?

3. What type of approach and outcome was obvious (Win-Win, Win-Lose)? Was it

reasonable?

4. Did the team reflect an understanding of the connections between communications and

their effects?

5. Did the dialogue include reasonably expected resistance rather than an artificial

cooperation?

6. Did the team show seriousness of purpose (other than stage jitters and laughing at

themselves occasionally) about the purpose of the role-playing evaluation?