Communication: A Critical/Cultural Introduction, 2e Warren & Fassett
Chapter 10: Interpersonal Relationships in Culture
Lecture Outline
Chapter Summary:
In this chapter we are introduced to interpersonal communication and it’s connection of
culture. Students will learn about the contexts in which relationships are built as well as
the role of self-disclosure in maintaining a relationship. Furthermore, the use of rituals is
explored and the role they play in communication within relationships. Relationships
encounter tensions that we must negotiate. Finally, the connection between public
advocacy and interpersonal communication is explored.
Chapter Goals:
Explore how interpersonal communication is mediated by culture
Appreciate relational partners as whole people, rich with their own experiences
and feelings
Describe the role of power in relationships, particularly in terms of relational
struggle
Articulate and practice the importance of communication, in general, and
listening, in particular to all aspects of relationship development and negotiation
I. Relationships always exist within the general framework of culture.
a. Interpersonal communication describes the exchange or interaction that
occurs between people who are in an interdependent relationship.
i. Communication between these people means that they have a stake
in each other, such as a mother and son.
ii. Creating relationships is about working to understand others as
individuals
II. Communication is the bridge that connects two or more people.
a. When we communicate, we generate meanings and connections with
others that then become the context for our lives.
b. Culture is produced in and by the relationships we form.
c. Culture is produced through handed-down understandings from others.
d. Culture is what we make of it; that is, we adjust our communication to the
action taking place.
e. Culture is not fully formed and static, but rather it is a process of bridge
building.
III. Relational communication occurs in a context, which is marked by time,
identities, perceptions, and power relations.
a. These cultural frames guide our actions with others.
b. The self is a carefully crafted performance-stylized, rehearsed, and
produced for an audience.
i. Who we are is a compilation of choices we’ve pulled together for
others.
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Communication: A Critical/Cultural Introduction, 2e Warren & Fassett
ii. Understanding our selves is important to knowing how and why
we form relationships.
iii. Our self has a frontstage and a backstage.
1. The audience sees the frontstage.
2. Backstage choices are private.
c. Goffman identifies the effects of communicative frames on how people
make meaning of situations
i. A frame is a context, such as the environment or circumstances
surrounding a communication encounter, that helps you understand
how to process an instance of communication.
ii. We read each scene—communication encounter—for the frame to
help us understand and communicate accordingly.
d. Bateson’s notion of play (ex., insulting) happens within a frame—or
metacommunication, communicating about communication—that
suggests that what we are doing isn’t real.
i. Interpersonal relationships define this form of play.
1. Relational partners understand the frame and the meaning
of a situation in order to respond to it.
ii. Frames are informed by the kind of relationship that people have
with one another.
IV. Relational communication occurs in recognizable patterns and cultural rituals that
inform us about how to bond with each other.
a. All communication relies on patterns.
i. To some degree, we count on that predictability.
ii. These patterns are rituals.
b. Rituals guide our lives in everyday ways and can be influential in
relational life.
V. Relational life is a series of tensions.
a. Relational dialectics show us how our relational lives are always in flux
and subject to contradictory impulses (tensions).
i. Understanding and resolving these opposing tensions can sustain,
build, or harm a relationship.
ii. People in relationships negotiate three primary dialectics.
1. People look for connection and separation, seeking joining
together and maintaining a sense of individuality.
2. Relational members look for predictability and novelty; that
is, they seek the routine of knowing where a relationship is
going and the spontaneity for breaking away from those
routines.
3. People feel tension between the need for openness and
closedness, sharing and maintaining a sense of privacy.
a. Some degree of self-disclosure is a key
characteristic of any relationship, and mutual
sharing can build trust and create a sense of
interdependency in a relationship.
VI. We are constantly looking for relational connection with others.
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Communication: A Critical/Cultural Introduction, 2e Warren & Fassett
a. Buber provides a frame for thinking about relationships.
i. There are two relational types:
1. The “I-It” type characterizes a relationship between the
subject (I) and the object (It), which can create distance
between relational partners.
2. The “I-Thou” type represents a relationship with another.
a. The subject (I) encounters a person (Thou) and sees
a relationship rather than an experience (object/it).
ii. Buber’s argument is useful for the study of interpersonal
relationships for a few reasons.
1. There is something unique and important in the
establishment of relationships between people.
2. Relationships are fluid and unpredictable.
3. Relational partners have an ethic of responsibility,
regarding the relationship with another.
4. If we want to be in a relationship, we must meet the other
person, rather than expect the other to give in to us.
iii. Working toward dialogic communication, to Buber, means creating
the conditions for compassion and accountability, respecting each
member of the discussion.
VII. Interpersonal communication is not necessarily distinct from public advocacy.
a. Consider how relational life can be a metaphor for public communication.
i. Consider a variety of personal audiences (i.e. family, friends, etc.)
who also exist beyond your relationship.
b. Careful attention to the context of your speech will enable the message to
be more effective.
i. Analyzing the frame that surrounds your message, and your
audiences expectations about it, will allow you to meet the moment
with greater fluency.
c. Remember that it is important to engage an audience as people who are
knowledgeable and competent in the conversation.
i. Listening is about meeting your audience with a spirit of dialogue,
with compassion and considering the humanity of the audience.
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