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Chapter 8: Communicating Verbally
Instructor Resources
OBJECTIVES
• Define the characteristics of language.
• Explain the functions that verbal communication serves in interpersonal contexts.
• Apply cooperative principles of verbal communication in dealing with others.
• Describe the barriers to cooperative verbal communication and how to overcome them.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. The chapter begins by describing General Washington invoking Thomas Paine’s
inspiring words to motivate his weary troops for a perilous surprise attack on a British
garrison. Paine’s words not only inspired Washington’s men on to victory, but they
changed the course of history. Whose words have inspired you when you felt defeated?
How did those words help you? Some people believe strongly in the power of positive
affirmations—how helpful are they for you? How does putting an intention into words
help bring about results? What are the effects of campaign slogans, familiar mottoes, and
mission statements? What is the difference between impassioned speech and eloquence?
2. Have you studied a different language? How do the characteristics of language relate to
what you experienced learning and speaking a different language? How could being
fluent in a second language help you professionally?
3. Since language is symbolic, we are often challenged to agree on the meaning of a word.
Consider the word “romance.” What kinds of meanings and images does this word
suggest? Let’s brainstorm some possibilities.
4. How does the concept of personal idioms relate to the concepts of ingroups and
outgroups, as discussed earlier in the textbook? Can you (without being disrespectful or
offensive) offer some examples of personal idioms that are used in a particular ingroup to
which you belong? What purpose do these idioms serve in the group?
5. What experiences with American dialects have you gathered by living and/or traveling in
other parts of the country? Do you ascribe behavioral or intellectual characteristics to
certain dialects—in other words, does hearing a certain accent automatically make you
think of a certain type of person? What are some stereotypes associated with the
dialects? How do media stereotypes influence your perceptions of dialects?
6. A characteristic of language is that it evolves. What are some examples of current slang,
for instance, phrases you only began hearing and/or using in the last year or so? What
problems does slang present in interpersonal communication?
7. In 2005, the Scottsdale Unified School District in Arizona renamed several key school
positions as a means of emphasizing customer service principles. For example, school
receptionists became known as “Directors of First Impressions,” and bus drivers are now
known as “Transporters of Learners.” These changes point out two functions of
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language: (1) naming determines our perceptions of people, places, and objects; and (2)
language shapes our thinking. How are these two functions illustrated in this example?
What other examples can you provide related to work organizations?
8. Many of you are probably familiar with the childhood adage, “Sticks and stones may
break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Do you agree? Given what you are
learning about language, naming, and prejudice, what type of adage would be more
appropriate to tell children?
9. “English Only” initiatives are quite controversial in several states. What questions are
raised by this controversy about the effective use of language, interpersonal competence,
and experiences of prejudice?
• Depending on your location, this issue may be a hot controversy in your state. The
10. What communication situations are most likely to produce communication
apprehension? Describe how you would create a communication plan for one of these
situations.
brainstorm the actual communication plan that could be utilized.
11. Describe a situation in which you have been the victim of verbal aggression. What are
some competent strategies for coping with aggression? Why does the intensity of
encounters involving verbal aggression increase?
THINK PAIR SHARE
Think Pair Share prompts support the active engagement of students in the learning
experience. The prompts can be particularly useful in punctuating the lecture presentation of
chapter concepts.
1. A common principle of communication holds that “meanings are in people.” How does
each of the five characteristics of language serve to illustrate this principle?
2. Take a word like “friend.” What is its denotative meaning and what is its connotative
meaning?
3. What is an example of how language shapes our thinking?
4. Which of the four characteristics of cooperative verbal communication do you believe is
most often violated in conversations that you have experienced?
5. Consider the common remark, “You don’t respect me!” How would this statement be
changed using “I” language?
6. How difficult would it be to teach an ESL (English as a Second Language) student the
idioms we use in the United States? For instance, how would you explain the meaning of
the following idiomatic phrases to someone who is learning to speak English?
© 2019 Macmillan Learning. All rights reserved.
7. Try to decode the meaning of the following idiomatic phrases:
• “As flash as a rat with a gold tooth.” (Australia)
• “As popular as a blowie at a butcher’s picnic.” (Australia)
• “Off your own bat.” (Great Britain)
8. Entertainer Sean Combs has changed his name at least five times. At various times, he’s
been known as Puff Daddy, Puff, Puffy, P. Diddy, and Diddy. Why do you think he has
changed his name so often?
9. Provide an example of a situation that causes you to experience communication
apprehension.
10. Is it ever acceptable to engage in deception?
JOURNAL PROMPTS
1. Would you ever consider changing your given legal name? Which characteristic of
language is most important to supporting your position? If you are married or if you got
married, would you be willing to change your last name to your spouse’s? Would you
consider hyphenating your name after marriage? Why or why not?
2. Review the four characteristics of cooperative verbal communication from the chapter
text. Which of the four do you believe you already follow? Which area could use some
improvement? What steps can you take to improve?
3. What is your experience with deceptive communication in online environments? Do you
believe people often provide false information about their backgrounds, professions,
appearances, and gender? Recount an experience in which another person used language
deceptively. What were the consequences?
4. What personal idioms do you have within your close relationships (family, friends,
romantic partners)? Which relationships have the most idioms? The least? What
conclusions can you draw about the relationship between idioms and intimacy?
5. What is your native tongue? How does this language connect you culturally with others
who speak the language? In what ways does the language you speak distance you from
people who speak another language?
6. Ludwig Wittgenstein once noted, “If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a
somewhat different world.” What do you think he meant by this? Provide an example
that supports your viewpoint.
7 . Explain a recent situation in which you reacted defensively. Which of the four types of
defensive messages did you use to respond? What attributions did you make about the
other person’s suggestion, advice, or criticism? What were the results of your response?
What could you do differently next time?
8. It is estimated that by the year 2100, 50 percent of the world’s 7,000-plus languages will
become extinct. English is in no danger of disappearing anytime soon, so if you are a
native English speaker, you might feel that language extinction does not affect you.
However, why should you care if languages die out? What might be lost? Can you
imagine how you would feel if English were endangered?
9. Complete the Self-Quiz: “Test Your Deception Acceptance.” What is your reaction to
your score? How does it make you feel when you are deceived?
EXPERIENTIAL ACTIVITIES
Exercise: The Constructive Complaint
Objective: To practice using “I” language in developing a constructive complaint.
1. Review the following for students:
• Criticism frequently involves language that causes the other to become defensive and
2. Have students complete the Constructive Complaint Worksheet individually or in small
groups.
© 2019 Macmillan Learning. All rights reserved.
1. “You never do anything around here.”
2. “Why can’t you ever be on time?”
3. “Do you have to be so antisocial around my family?”
4. “You always have to be right. I can never get a word in edgewise.”
Constructive complaint:
5. “Do you think you could be more considerate of others when you come stumbling in at 3
a.m.? In case you’ve forgotten, I have to be up by 6 to get to work.”
6. “Hey, dude, is your phone broken?”
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Exercise: Sharing Word Meanings
Objective: To analyze denotative and connotative word meanings.
1. Have students write out a one- or two-sentence definition for each of the following terms:
Respect
Family
Sports
Joke
Love
Soda
Cancer
Work
Beauty
2. Students should compare their definitions in small groups.
3. Debrief the small groups with the following questions:
1. Which words were easy to define? Which were more difficult? Why?
2. Do your definitions reflect denotative or connotative meanings? Explain.
3. What examples can you provide of how these words could present problems of
misunderstanding in interpersonal relationships?
Exercise: Communication Apprehension and Interpersonal Competence
Objective: To complete the Personal Report of Communication Apprehension (PRCA-24)
and consider the class profile of communication apprehension.
a. Have students complete the Personal Report of Communication Apprehension on
LaunchPad.
b. Tabulate and organize the class results in the following table:
Scale
Mean Scores Women
Mean Scores Men
Group Discussion
Meeting
Interpersonal
Public Speaking
Overall
c. Discuss the following regarding the class averages:
• What do these scores mean to you?
• What is consistent with what you already knew?
• What surprises you?
• What factors influence communication apprehension in these four different settings?
Give some examples.
• How would a communication plan strategy help in these situations? What other
strategies might be useful?
Exercise: What’s In A Name?
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Directions:
1. Provide students with a list of names and have them write down the first thing that
comes to mind when reading each name. (A sample list is provided for you below.)
2. After students have completed Step 1, read each name and ask students to share their
impressions. Are there any shared perceptions? Are the differences between
impressions significant? What, if any, sociological inferences can be drawn from an
individual’s name?
* Many students will indicate a strong positive affinity or dislike for various
names because the names remind the students of particular people they like or
dislike.
* Some students may suggest that certain names sound masculine, feminine, or
unisex.
* Some sociological inferences that may be drawn from names include gender,
age, race/ethnicity, religion, and social class. Explore with your students
whether these inferences are neutral or stereotypical in nature (e.g., presuming
that “Miguel” is Latin might be neutral, whereas presuming that “LaShonda”
comes from the inner city might be stereotypical).
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What’s in a Name?
Directions: Write down your first impression to each of the names below.
Name First Impression
1. Myron
3. LaShonda
5. Billie Jean
7. Isabella
9. Harvey
11. Lucinda
13. Udita
15. Ria
17. Grace
19. Quade
20. Chelsea
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Exercise: Please Don’t Call Me That
Objective: To have students examine the effect that labels can have on people.
Directions:
1. Have students divide into small groups of the same sex, preferably three to five
students per group.
2. Instruct each group to designate a recorder, who is responsible for writing down
the terms cited by his or her group. Then ask the students to share labeling words
associated with gender that the students find offensive. For example, do females
dislike the terms “chick” or “babe”? Do males dislike the terms “boy” or “hunk”?
3. Each recorder should share his or her list with the rest of the class, and the
4. The instructor should lead a discussion that prompts students to share their reasons
for why these words are considered offensive. If possible, respectful debate should
be initiated between persons who disagree about particular words (e.g., if a female
student describes “chick” as offensive, ask if any female students disagree, etc.).
VIDEO RECOMMENDATIONS
Finding Dory (2016, 97 minutes). This Disney-Pixar film offers a wonderful look at
communication and how it functions to build and maintain relationships. Several examples of
the Cooperative Principle can be found in the film as Dory, the lovable blue fish from
Finding Nemo, travels the vast ocean, meeting new types of fish, all while trying to find her
way back home.
Darkest Hour (2017, 125 minutes). Based on the true story of Winston Churchill, this film
begins at the precipice of World War II as Winston Churchill faces one of his darkest hours:
the decision to negotiate a peace treaty with Nazi Germany, or fight head-on against the
seemingly indestructible Nazi regime. The film illustrates use of “we” language, verbal
aggression, defensive communication, linguistic determinism, and much more.
Columbus (2017, 120 minutes) This story begins with Jin, a Korean-born man, who travels to
Columbus, Indiana, to visit his ailing father. He meets a young woman staying in Columbus
to care for her recovering addict mother. Together the two explore the architecture of
Columbus and engage in deep conversations about life, love, and their futures. The film
offers several opportunities to explore verbal and nonverbal communication, as well as the
intricate connection between communication, culture, and gender.
The Color Purple (1985, 154 minutes). Based on the Alice Walker novel, this film brings to
life the power of speech acts. It follows the story of Celie (Whoopi Goldberg), a young
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African American woman in rural Georgia during the 1930s. After being separated from her
beloved sister, Celie is tormented by her abusive husband, Albert (Danny Glover), whom she
calls “Mister.”
He’s Just Not That Into You (2009, 129 minutes). Featuring an all-star cast (Ben Affleck,
Jennifer Aniston, Drew Barrymore, among others), this romantic comedy offers great
examples of confusion over connotative meanings. Furthermore, the film illustrates
misrepresentation, deception, and misunderstanding as the nine characters work through their
relationships.
High Fidelity (2000, 113 minutes). This movie tells the story of a neurotic record store owner
(played by John Cusack) and his romantic challenges. The snappy dialogue offers several
examples of denotative and connotative meaning in verbal communication.
The N Word: Divided We Stand (2006, 85 minutes). This Peabody Award-winning
documentary explores the history, evolution, and connotations of the “n word,” a politically
charged reference to African Americans. Various figures—including Richard Pryor, Whoopi
Goldberg, and Samuel L. Jackson—offer insights about when to use the word, when not to
use the word, and whether the word should be banned.
Bullied: A Student, a School and a Case That Made History (2010, 40 minutes). This
powerful documentary is aimed at educating students to understand the toll that bullying can
take on its victims and how to be an advocate for those who suffer at the hands of bullies.
(Note: This film is available free of charge from http://www.tolerance.org/bullying-basics,
and the DVD comes with lesson plans and activities that can be incorporated into the
classroom; however, each school can receive only one copy, so check with your school’s
library before ordering.)
WEB RESOURCES
After Racist Tweet, Roseanne Barr’s Show Is Canceled by ABC
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/29/business/media/roseanne-barr-offensive-tweets.html
This article addresses ABC’s abrupt decision to cancel the show “Roseanne,” hours after the
main character, Roseanne Barr, tweets a racist comment about former President Obama’s
senior advisor.
Hear America’s Regional Dialects in Action
www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2013/11/26/soda_pop_coke_hear_regional_dialect_variation
_of_u_s_in_video_from_the_atlantic.html
This video spotlights the various dialects throughout the United States through a telephone
survey; in this video we hear various people in different parts of the United States talking
about their language, the terms they use for words such as soft drinks, food, and more, and
how they pronounce certain words.
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Dialect Map of U.S. Shows How Americans Speak by Region
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/09/dialect-map-of-the-us-region-
aschmann_n_3245496.html
This site offers a visual map of the various dialects that exist throughout the United States.
Some people might believe that each region of the United States only has one dialect, but
many areas, such as Massachusetts, have multiple dialects.
Do You Speak American?
www.pbs.org/speak
Based on a 2006 PBS program, this website contains a wealth of information about American
English usage, including information and activities exploring regional dialects, slang, and
current controversies.
The Linguists: Endangered Languages
http://www.pbs.org/thelinguists/Endangered-Languages/
It is estimated that every 14 days, a language dies—and that more than 50 percent of the
world’s 7,000-plus languages will become extinct by the year 2100. This website provides
information about endangered languages and what’s being done to archive them, plus
instructional videos and teachers’ resources.
“On Language”
http://topics.nytimes.com/top/features/magazine/columns/on_language/index.html
William Safire discusses the evolving state of American English in his weekly New York
Times Magazine column “On Language.” This webpage features an archive of Safire’s
articles.
High and Low Context
http://www.culture-at-work.com/highlow.html
From the website Communicating Across Cultures comes this detailed page on high- and
low-context cultures; it feature thoughts about how to navigate both types of cultures.
Interpersonal/Small-Scale Communication
http://www.beyondintractability.org/essay/interpersonal_communication
Featured on the BeyondIntractability.org website, this essay focuses on basic principles of
interpersonal communication in examining misunderstanding. The page featuring the article
also provides links to several other web resources.
Popular Baby Names
http://www.socialsecurity.gov/OACT/babynames/
This page of the U.S. Social Security Administration’s website has a searchable database
showing the rankings of popular baby names by year, going back as far as 1880.
“Man Kicked Off Flight over Language on Shirt”
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http://www.cnn.com/videos/us/2015/03/25/pkg-offensive-shirt-kicked-out-southwest-
flight.kplr-ktvi
A young man is kicked off an airplane flight for wearing an offensive T-shirt.
“Paula Deen Apologizes For ‘Hurtful’ Language”
http://www.cnn.com/videos/us/2013/06/21/nr-paula-deen-apology.cnn
This video on CNN shows Paula Deen’s emotional apology after she used the “n–word”.
“Ukraine Hunger Strike over Language Law”
http://www.cnn.com/videos/world/2012/07/17/pkg-chance-ukraine-hunger-strike.cnn
This CNN video focuses on how hunger strikers in Ukraine are protesting a new law that
allows other languages to be spoken in the country.
“Language Use in the U.S.”
http://www.cnn.com/videos/bestoftv/2014/05/20/exp-gps-last-look-0518.cnn
This CNN video examines what languages besides English are spoken in various regions in
the United States.
Lying and Deception in Romantic Relationships
http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/lying-and-deception.html
This page provides information about deception in romantic relationships.
“These Words You Use Every Day Have Racist/Prejudiced Pasts, and You Had No
Idea”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/24/offensive-words
-_n_4144472.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000009
This article focuses on the history of words and phrases that at one time were considered
offensive.
“Gay Man Says Millennial Term ‘Queer’ Is Like the ‘N’ Word”
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/gay-man-millennial-term-queer-
word/story?id=20855582&singlePage=true
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“The Word,” performed by the Beatles
“Honesty,” performed by Billy Joel
“Would I Lie to You,” performed by Eurythmics
“Say Anything,” performed by Anderson East
“Brave,” performed by Sara Bareilles
“To Speak the Word,” performed by Tracy Chapman
“(Can I) Find the Right Words to Say,” performed by Blondie
“I Love You More Than Words Can Say,” performed by Otis Redding
“Words as Weapons,” performed by Birdy
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Chapter 8: Communicating Verbally
Lecture Outline
I. Verbal communication is the exchange of spoken language with others during
interactions. Language has five distinct characteristics:
A. Language is symbolic.
1. Words are the primary symbols we use to represent people, objects, events, and
ideas.
2. We rely on surrounding contexts and conversational participants to help clarify
2. Regulative rules govern how we use language when we verbally communicate,
1. Personal idioms are words and phrases that have unique meanings within groups
1. Language is the set of symbols that members of a culture create to communicate
their thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, and values.
1. Even though we may believe that language is stable and static, all languages are
in a constant state of flux.
3. Regulative rules are subject to change as well.
1. Denotative meaning is the literal meaning of words, as agreed on by
conventional use in a culture.
2. Connotative meaning comprises additional understandings that are implied,
suggested, or hinted at by the words you choose while communicating with
1. The Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis posits that language defines the boundaries of our
2. People from different cultures perceive and think about the world in different
2. Culturally oppressed groups face a challenge in naming themselves, since the
names they choose get co-opted by others and are used as insults against them.
a. A prime example is the difficulty faced by members of the “LGBTQ”
1. Representative speech acts commit the speaker to the truth of what has been said.
3. Commissive speech acts commit the speaker to future action.
5. Declarative speech acts produce dramatic and observable effects.
F. Verbal communication is used to construct conversation.
2. Conversations involve local management, which means that we make decisions
regarding who gets to speak, when, and how long, each time we exchange turns.
4. Conversations, especially first encounters, often follow scripts, rigidly structured
1. We maintain our ongoing relationships with lovers, family members, friends, and
co-workers through verbal communication.
2. People who communicate frequently with partners experience less uncertainty
and are more likely to stay together.
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III. Meaningful interactions and relationships are enhanced by cooperative communication.
A. Using cooperative verbal communication means producing easily understood
messages, taking active ownership for what you say, and making others feel
included.
B. According to the Cooperative Principle, basic principles of cooperative
communication include being informative, honest, relevant, and clear, given the
purposes and situational characteristics of the encounters in which you’re involved.
1. Be informative by: