9.8 Document for Analysis: Shooting Down Request for Salary Star Info
Weaknesses
a. Turns off the reader with an immediate blunt announcement of bad news.
b. Uses an accusatory tone and even suggests possible litigation resulting from the request.
Revision
To: Avalon Carrera <avalon.carrera@inthepipeline.net>
From: Ralph Freedman <rfreedman@msilaboratories.org>
Subject: Your Request for MSI Laboratories Salary Information
Attached: MSI Salespeople Fact Sheet
Dear Ms. Carrera:
We at MSI appreciate your interest in our organization as you are researching comparative salary and
commission information for your blog In the Pipeline. The article sounds fascinating and will certainly be
of interest to readers in our industry.
We are proud that we do have many outstanding young salespeople, both male and female, who
command top salaries. Each of our salespeople operates under an individual salary contract that was
Cordially,
9.9 Request Refusal: Pink Phoenix Team Sinks Application
To: Jenny Johnson <jjohnson@pinkphoenix.org>
From: Your Name <your e-mail address>
Subject: Your Request for Adobe Sponsorship
Dear Jenny:
We enjoyed learning about the fascinating sport of dragon boat racing and about the role it plays in the
lives of many active breast cancer survivors. Your team is to be commended for its competitive spirit and
positive attitude.
Our company supports a variety of great causes, breast cancer among them. We receive requests for
9.10 Request Refusal: Sorry to Be Unable to Help Neglected Children
Current date
Ms. Elliana Larios
8569 East 39th Street
Phoenix, AZ 85730
Dear Ms. Larios:
Let me commend you on the fine work you are doing as a volunteer with CASA. Its programs to recruit,
9.11 Bad News to Customers: Putting the Brakes on Bakery Deliveries
Current date
Mr. Emil Broussard
Café Broussard
2013 West Lee Drive
Baton Rouge, LA 70820
9.12 Bad News to Customers: Blunder in Scheduling Fairytale Cottage Wedding
In a memo students should outline a course of action, such as the following:
Call each bride-to-be, describe the problem, and apologize.
Explain why the problem occurred, what you are doing to resolve it, and how you will prevent it from
happening again.
Offer a bonus if one of the brides will switch days.
Promote goodwill by following up with messages that document the phone calls and provide details of
the bonus offer.
Sincerely,
9.13 Claim Denial: Whining on the Web
Students will find numerous legitimate complaints about products and services. For example, one writer
9.14 Claim Denial: Pricey Prescription Eyewear Left on Plane
Current date
Ms. Cynthia Mercier-Walters
8400 S 51st Avenue
Glendale, AZ 85301
Enclosure
9.15 Bad News to Customers: Selecting Sturdy Stepper for Snap Fitness Gym
Current date
Mr. Lawrence Holder
Snap Fitness Gym
1212 Bahama Drive
Richmond, KY 40475
Dear Mr. Holder:
9.16 Bad News to Customers: Glitch Admits Rejected Student Applicants
To: [Student applicant’s e-mail address]
From: David Phillips <dphillips@johnshopkins.edu>
Subject: Erroneous E-Mail Message Announcing Admission to Johns Hopkins University
Dear Johns Hopkins Applicant,
Very recently we sent you an e-mail message by mistake. It welcomed those who have been admitted to
campus. That message should have gone only to the 3,065 students accepted by Johns Hopkins
9.17 Bad News to Customers: Pick a Price Hike
Note: Student messages will vary. Here are portions of an authentic letter announcing a newspaper rate
increase.
Dear Home Delivery Subscriber:
9.18 Disappointed Customers: J. Crew Cashmere for a Song?
To: [e-mail address of J. Crew customer]
From: J. Crew <staff@jcrew.com>
Subject: Your Cashmere Turtleneck Order
Dear J. Crew Web Shopper:
At J. Crew we take pride in offering fashionable clothes at affordable prices. Recently at our Web site you
ordered a sensational zip turtleneck cashmere sweater at the amazing, yet erroneous price of $28.
To ensure accurate pricing, we double-check all copy material before it is posted to our website.
Occasionally, though, we miss a typo. In the case of this cashmere sweater, that $28 cashmere sweater
9.19 Disappointed Customers: No Checks, No Pay
Lead a class discussion centered on the following questions. Consider having two students role-play the
parts of Ethan Alexander, sales manager, and customer Mia Madison.
a. Should Alexander call Madison or delegate the task to his assistant?
Alexander is the sales manager and presumably is the main contact that Madison has with the
b. When should Madison be informed of the problem? Immediately.
c. What is the best procedure for delivering the bad news?
•Call the individual involved.
In describing the problem and apologizing, Alexander might say, We discovered just this morning that
your check order will not be printed by the date I originally promised. I apologize for causing a difficult
situation for your company.
In explaining how the problem occurred, Alexander might say that the employee who schedules
orders to be printed misread the promised delivery date for your checks; therefore, he didn’t schedule
In explaining what is being done to avoid recurrence of the problem, Alexander might say, “We’ve
instituted a new system to keep this problem from happening again. After the employee does the
In concluding his telephone call, Alexander should strive for a positive tone that promotes goodwill:
d. What follow-up to the phone call would you recommend to Alexander?
Alexander should write a follow-up letter that documents the phone call and promotes goodwill. In
9.20 Credit Refusal: Cash Rules at Crunch Gym
Current date
Ms. Ava Koenig
20 S Broadway, Apt. 4
Billings, MT 59101
9.21 Bad News to Employees: Saying Goodbye to Gourmet Meals and Perks
Dear Minx Employees,
Your hard work and creative talents have produced a number of amazingly successful products for Minx
customers. As a result of your efforts, we have been able to offer an outstanding workplace with many
amenities to attract the best and brightest talent.
As you know, some products did not succeed, and we face a period of contracting profits. Although we
must cut back on some perks we have been able to offer in the past, we are very pleased that we are not
9.22 Bad News to Employees: Nixing Social Media at Work
To: Staff Members
From: Darcy M. Diamond <dmdiamond@marketingmatters.com>
Subject: Avoiding the Perils of Social Media
Most of us would probably agree that sharing information on Facebook can lead to professional
networking opportunities. Social media and Web-based collaboration tools such as Slack, Google Docs,
and wikis can increase productivity and create digitally savvy workers. However, by now most workers
know that overexposure or inappropriate behavior online can lead to privacy breaches and have very