CHAPTER 8
Improving Interpersonal Relations with
Constructive Self-Disclosure
CHAPTER PREVIEW
After studying this chapter, students should be able to:
1. Explain how constructive self-disclosure contributes to improved interpersonal relationships and
teamwork.
2. Understand the specific benefits you can gain from self-disclosure.
3. Identify and explain the major elements of the Johari Window model.
4. Explain the criteria for appropriate self-disclosure.
5. Understand the barriers to self-disclosure in an organizational setting.
6. Apply your knowledge and practice constructive self-disclosure.
PURPOSE AND PERSPECTIVE
Self-disclosure is the process of letting another person know what you think, feel, or want. The primary
goal of constructive self-disclosure is the building of strong and healthy interpersonal relationships.
Early in the chapter, students review four basic rewards to be gained from self-disclosure. The Johari
Window is then described in detail. This model identifies four kinds of information about ourselves that
affect our communication with other people. The remainder of the chapter looks at factors that
contribute to appropriate self-disclosure and the major barriers to constructive self-disclosure. This
chapter helps the student understand behaviors that build and destroy trust.
PRESENTATION OUTLINE
I. Self-Disclosure: An Introduction
A. Self-disclosure defined
II. Benefits Gained from Self-Disclosure
A. Basic benefits
1. Increased accuracy in communication
2. Reduction of stress
3. Increased self-awareness
4. Stronger relationships
B. Authenticity
III. The Johari Window: A Model for Self-Understanding
A. The four panes of the Johari Window
1. Open area
2. Blind area
3. Hidden area
4. Unknown area
B. Self-disclosure/feedback styles
30 Chapter 8: Improving Interpersonal Relations with Constructive Self-Disclosure
C. The importance of self-awareness
1. 360-degree feedback
2. Increase self-awareness through journal writing
IV. Appropriate Self-Disclosure
A. Use self-disclosure to repair damaged relationships
1. The art of apologizing
2. The art of forgiveness
B. Present constructive criticism with care
1. Responding to criticism at work
C. Discuss disturbing situations as they happen
D. Accurately describe your feelings and emotions
E. Select the right time and place
F. Avoid overwhelming others with your self-disclosure
V. Barriers to Self-Disclosure in an Organizational Setting
A. Lack of trust
B. Trust Index
VI. Practice Self-Disclosure
CAREER INSIGHT EXERCISE
“Oversharing in an interview is the most dangerous thing you can do,” says Anne Stevens. Students can
discuss the pros and cons of this point of view.
TRY YOUR HAND EXERCISES
1. Answers will vary. Encourage students to reflect on their written responses and work on self-
disclosure skills that are not fully developed.
2. Most students will select item c as the best option. A sincere apology would be appropriate in this
case.
3. The HR–Guide website includes a “360° Feedback” link under the “Surveys” heading. According
to this page, 360-degree feedback is collected via a survey questionnaire from a group of 8–16
individuals (from within and/or outside the organization) representing various roles in relation to
the employee. The feedback is often utilized for employee development (e.g., training) purposes,
but may also be incorporated into the formal performance appraisal process or used to evaluate
project teams. Prior to implementing 360-degree feedback collection, organizations should
provide employee education regarding the value of this type of feedback and the survey format
and procedure that will be used. Good feedback will be specific, indicating how the person’s
behavior in a particular situation impacts others and is consistent or inconsistent with
organizational policies and goals, and will include suggestions for improvement.
CRITICAL THINKING CHALLENGE
This critical thinking challenge will give students an opportunity to reflect on past self-disclosure
experiences. They will also consider how to mentally prepare for important meetings (such as job
interviews) in which inappropriate or excessive self-disclosure could backfire.
SELF-ASSESSMENT EXERCISE
Low scores on these assessment items indicate failure to recall or accept the information on self–
disclosure presented in the chapter. Students are asked to prepare a written goal for improving an
attitude or skill related to self-disclosure concepts and to outline the steps required to achieve the goal.
Chapter 8: Improving Interpersonal Relations with Constructive Self-Disclosure 31
YOU PLAY THE ROLE EXERCISE
To be fully prepared for this role-play activity, students need to study the text material related to
appropriate self-disclosure when apologizing. Remind students that an effective apology will
communicate the three Rs—regret, responsibility, and remedy—and avoid the expression patterns
described in Table 8.2.
CASE QUESTIONS
BELOW THE SURFACE: Winning Student Respect
1. Students might respond that self-awareness promotes self-esteem by allowing a person to identify
factors that reduce self-efficacy or self-respect, accept responsibility for his or her actions, and
identify existing strengths that can be built upon through goal setting and achievement. Similarly,
self-awareness helps the person recognize what she or he can and cannot control in a given
situation, which may help the person to face it realistically and thus to better cope with it.
2. Student responses will vary; they can reflect on how pride can interfere with or damage
relationships.
CLOSING CASE: Xerox CEO Speaks Her Mind
1. Student can discuss the importance of trust in a near-bankruptcy situation.
2. Ask students to consider the role of gender and ethnicity in building trust.
3. Student responses will vary. Most students will agree that strong core values developed during
childhood have helped Ursula Burns maintain honesty and candor throughout her career.
ADDITIONAL APPLICATION EXERCISES
1. In most real-life situations, we engage in self-description before we engage in self-disclosure. The
sharing of nonthreatening information often helps people discover mutual interests. This
application exercise will provide you with an opportunity to share information about yourself with
others. At the top of an 8 ½” × 11” sheet of paper, print the words Who Am I? Then print eight to
ten answers to the question. When possible, use only one- or two-word responses, such as pizza
lover, Republican, and sky diver. Circulate throughout the room and compare your list with those
of other class members. Try not to spend more than two or three minutes with any one person.
Note to the Instructor: This activity will help students get better acquainted and should set the
stage for greater self-disclosure.
2. On a blank sheet of paper, list what you consider to be the major barriers to self-disclosure in an
organizational setting. Once you have completed your list, rank each item in terms of importance.
Assign number 1 to the most important barrier, number 2 to the second most important barrier,
and so on. (This activity should take about five minutes.) Now join two or three other class
members and compare your rankings.
Note to the Instructor: You may want to instruct each small group to develop a list of barriers
(rank-ordered) representing group consensus.
3. Learning how to make amends after we mess up is an important human relations skill. Making
amends is often necessary to repair trust that was damaged when we offended another person in
some way. Instruct students to make a list of relationships that need repair and then briefly
develop a plan for making amends. After students have worked about ten minutes on this task,
32 Chapter 8: Improving Interpersonal Relations with Constructive Self-Disclosure
break them into groups of three and ask them to share one of their plans. After the small groups
have discussed their plans for about 15 minutes, ask each group for feedback.