Chapter 6: Listening to Resolve Conflict and Build Lasting
Relationships
ANSWERS TO TRUE/FALSE QUESTIONS FROM THE TEXT
1. T
ANSWERS TO MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESTIONS FROM THE TEXT
1. a
SUGGESTED ANSWERS TO DISCUSSION QUESTIONS FROM THE TEXT
1. It is appropriate to paraphrase the content of someone’s message when the message is
4. Many times empathy will reduce anger very quickly, so give an empathic response. When
you get angry, say so, bring your anger to the awareness of the other person. If your anger or
SUGGESTIONS FOR THE CASE FROM THE TEXT
Case: Listening at different levels
Starting tips: Discuss each scenario as a class, referring back to the text for guidance and
answering each of the four questions in the case questions.
Desired outcomes: Suggested response to the questions follow:
Scenario #1
1. Anton is complaining about the circumstances of his life. When considered in light of his
2. Joe might simply listen and allow Anton to vent, without giving any response. If Anton
phone.”
3. Joe might give empathic responses to Anton, such as, “You feel frustrated about the
4. It appears that Anton has no problem sharing his life story, so there may not be a lot more
Scenario #2
1. Tamiko is expressing fear, anxiety, and nervousness.
2. Joe can show he is listening for content by using paraphrases, such as, “You say Sally
3. Joe will need to show empathy. Regarding Tamiko’s specific responses and behaviors, he
4. Joe should first inform Tamiko that it was appropriate for her to come to him about her
concerns. He should also assure her that he will take her concerns seriously and will do
Scenario #3
2. There is little Joe may be able to do to show that he is hearing content. This is mostly
3. Since Sally is expressing strong emotion, Joe can give empathic responses, such as, “You
4. Joe can start by asking Sally to slow down. He might do this by suggesting she take a
deep breath and have a seat. He can offer to get her a drink of water. He can then ask
Scenario #4
2. Joe has a similar situation as he did when meeting with Sally. There is not much he can
do to show he is listening for content because Fred is ticking off his grievances in rapid
succession. Further, Fred is being evaluative, rather than descriptive, in his comments.
specific inquiries after Fred has vented.
3. Joe can make empathic responses such as, “You seem upset, tell me more,” and, “Sally
4. Just as he would do with Sally, Joe should slow Fred down a little. Because Fred is
Suggested summary: Students should gain an increased understanding of the skills and
techniques involved in listening for content and listening for feelings. In particular, they should
gain an increased understanding of how paraphrasing and empathic responses are used to
demonstrate that you are listening to someone.
TEST QUESTIONS
True or False questions (each worth 1 or 2 points)
__T__ 1. An active listener will respond first to the part of the message that he thinks is most
important to the sender.
Multiple Choice (worth 2 or 3 points each)
a. Content
which level of communication?
a. Level I
a. You are negotiating or mediating a conflict
Short Answer essay questions (each worth up to 10 points)
1. List and describe the three parts of a message
Answer:
Part I: Content: Facts, data, information sent (written or spoken)
2. Describe “internal noise” and provide a tool to use to reduce its effect on listening.
Answer:
Internal noise resides within our own mind and is also called our internal dialog or
3. What is a paraphrase and what affect does it have on communication?
Answer:
A paraphrase is verbal feedback you give to the sender of a message before you take action. A
INSTRUCTIONS FOR FACILITATING EXERCISE 6-1: BACK-TO-BACK
COMMUNICATION
This is a very popular exercise with participants. It usually promotes a very lively and loud
Time to complete: Approximately 15 minutes, including large group discussion.
Facilitating the large group discussion: When the noise from the conversations begins to die
INSTRUCTIONS FOR FACILITATING EXERCISE 6-2: LET ME PARAPHRASE
Following the instructions found with the exercise in the chapter will usually produce a lively
Purpose: To demonstrate Level II communication.
1. What effect did the paraphrase have on the sender? The sender usually says that he is
2. What effect did the paraphrase have on the listener? The listener is more attentive and
3. What effect did the paraphrase have on the message? The paraphrase is usually shorter
INSTRUCTIONS FOR FACILITATING EXERCISE 6-3: TELL ME HOW YOU THINK I’M
FEELING
Participants are asked to discuss, with their partner, a situation that is causing them a conflict.
Remind the participants to pick something that they will be willing and comfortable to talk
about.
Purpose: To demonstrate Level III communication.