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Indicate whether the statement is true or false.
1. It is important to use as much metacommunication as possible during conflict.
a. True
b. False
2. It is best to address conflict right away, even if one person is tired or you’re in a public setting.
a. True
b. False
3. One advantage to conflict in digital environments is that it is possible to step back to cool off and later resolve the
conflict.
a. True
b. False
4. Gender, sexual orientation, and race/ethnicity may influence orientations toward conflict.
a. True
b. False
5. Women are more likely than men to use coercive tactics, both verbal and physical, to avoid discussing problems and to
force their resolutions on others.
a. True
b. False
6. Passive aggression involves a person acting aggressively while denying that he or she is feeling or acting aggressive.
a. True
b. False
7. Cross-complaining occurs when one person’s complaint is met by a countercomplaint.
a. True
b. False
8. Conflict involves more than just having differences.
a. True
b. False
9. Disagreement and conflict are strongly disapproved of in many Asian cultures.
a. True
b. False
10. Research has shown that forgiveness is a major influence on how or whether relationships progress.
a. True
b. False
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11. In a game called “blemish,” one person pretends to complimentary but actually puts the other person down.
a. True
b. False
12. Conflict is inherently negative.
a. True
b. False
13. Conflict can be beneficial for individuals and relationships.
a. True
b. False
14. Lack of conflict is the best indicator of a healthy relationship.
a. True
b. False
15. In a conflict situation, it is most important to focus on the content level of meaning rather than the relationship level of
meaning.
a. True
b. False
16. Many Mediterranean cultures regard lively conflict as normal, valuable part of everyday life.
a. True
b. False
17. Bracketing involves interrupting in order to get clarification during conflict.
a. True
b. False
18. The win–win conflict style is the best approach for every relationship and situation.
a. True
b. False
Indicate the answer choice that best completes the statement or answers the question.
19. Desi and Consuela are arguing about how to spend the tax refund they received. He says they should get the car fixed;
she says they should first go on a vacation; he then suggests they fix the car and use any money left to vacation; she
suggests they sell the car and be rid of the problem. Desi and Consuela are engaging in which pattern of unproductive
conflict?
a. Excessive metacommunication
b. Kitchen-sinking
c. Counterproposals
d. Cross-complaining
e. Self-summarizing
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20. All of the following are principles of interpersonal conflict EXCEPT:
a. conflict is both natural and inevitable in interpersonal relationships.
b. conflict can be directly communicated or covertly expressed through indirect communication.
c. conflict styles and meanings are shaped by social location—membership in cultures and social communities.
d. conflict can be managed well or poorly.
e. conflict is typically destructive for individuals and relationships.
21. All of the following are forms of constructive communication EXCEPT:
a. counterproposals.
b. sensitive listening.
c. compromises.
d. dual perspective.
e. asking for clarification.
22. According to Eric Berne, games
a. are effective ways to manage conflict.
b. involve overt responses to conflict situations.
c. help people recognize conflicts.
d. allow those in conflict to handle disagreements in fun ways.
e. hide the real issues in a conflict.
23. Specific communication behaviors that contribute to unproductive interpersonal conflict include all of the following
EXCEPT:
a. disconfirmation.
b. hostile mind reading.
c. asking questions for clarification.
d. self-summarizing.
e. offering counterproposals.
24. Lenny says, “I don’t like to lose arguments. The way I figure it, when you have a disagreement there can be only one
winner.” Lenny’s orientation to conflict is best described as
a. hit–miss.
b. win–win.
c. win–lose
d. tie–tie.
e. lose–lose.
25. All of the following are American styles of business negotiation EXCEPT:
a. indirectly letting the other party know your bottom line.
b. being adversarial.
c. working to win all you can.
d. overstating your initial position to establish a strong image.
e. keeping your bottom line secret from the other person to preserve power and gain the most.
26. The ________ stages of constructive conflict are marked by what Gottman calls agenda building.
a. early
b. middle
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c. later
d. exit
e. imaginary
27. The most interpersonally constructive but passive response to relational conflict is the ________ response.
a. exit
b. voice
c. loyalty
d. neglect
e. ambush
28. Which one of the following statements is true about conflict in relationships?
a. Disagreement must be expressed directly for conflict to exist.
b. Conflict is inevitable in most interpersonal relationships.
c. Any difference in values, opinions, attitudes, and/or beliefs will lead to conflict.
d. It is impossible to maintain a healthy relationship if conflicts begin to arise.
e. Healthy relationships have little or no conflict.
29. All of the following are conflict management skills EXCEPT:
a. listening mindfully.
b. communicating supportively.
c. owning your feelings, thoughts, and issues.
d. looking for points of disagreement.
e. imagining how you will feel in the future.
30. The ________ response to interpersonal conflict is both destructive and passive.
a. exit
b. voice
c. loyalty
d. neglect
e. ambush
31. Constructive conflict communication includes
a. preoccupation with oneself.
b. hostile mindreading.
c. as much metacommunication as possible.
d. agenda building.
e. frequent interruptions.
32. Which statement is true of grace?
a. Grace is always an appropriate approach.
b. Grace includes an expectation of some kind of payback.
c. Grace is an obligation rather than a choice.
d. Grace means letting others have their way when there is no other alternative.
e. Grace involves forgiving someone for something they did when there is no standard that you should forgive.
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33. Zach believes that in conflict situations the goal is to find a solution that all those involved can accept. Zach’s
orientation to conflict is best described as
a. hit–miss.
b. win–win.
c. win–lose.
d. tie–tie.
e. lose–lose.
34. Janet believes that nobody can win when conflict erupts. From her perspective, everyone is hurt by conflicts. Janet’s
orientation to conflict is best described as
a. hit–miss.
b. win–win.
c. win–lose
d. tie–tie.
e. lose–lose.
35. All of the following are forms of unproductive communication EXCEPT:
a. poor listening.
b. cross-complaining.
c. excessive metacommunication.
d. dual perspective.
e. kitchen-sinking.
36. The most active and interpersonally constructive response to relational conflict is the ________ response.
a. exit
b. voice
c. loyalty
d. neglect
e. ambush
37. In which stage do partners typically engage in contracting?
a. Early
b. Middle
c. Later
d. Exit
e. Dual
38. During an argument about money, Desi says, “Well, if you hadn’t wrecked the car, it wouldn’t need repairs and
money wouldn’t be a problem.” Consuela replies, “Yeah, and if you had been home when you said you’d be, I wouldn’t
have driven that day.” Desi and Consuela are engaging in what conflict pattern?
a. Cross-complaining
b. Excessive metacommunication
c. Self-summarizing
d. Making counterproposals
e. Kitchen-sinking
39. Each of the following are Japanese styles of business negotiation EXCEPT:
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a. avoiding confrontation.
b. explicitly expressing disagreement.
c. working to make sure that both parties succeed.
d. planning to spend a long time discussing issues before moving toward a decision.
e. understating your own initial position.
40. Contrast the communication behaviors identified as contributing to constructive and unproductive interpersonal
conflict. Relate the behaviors to principles of verbal communication, nonverbal behavior, and listening to explain why
particular behaviors are ineffective or effective.
41. Discuss and explain the four different responses to conflict.
42. What happens in the early, middle, and later stages of unproductive conflict?
43. Describe three Japanese styles of communication during business negotiations and three American styles of
communication during business negotiations as found by McDaniel and Quasha (2000) and Weiss (1987).
44. Eric Berne catalogued a number of games that people play. Define the concept of games as Berne does, describe their
characteristics, and provide an example to illustrate this concept. From what you know about effective communication
during conflict and constructive conflict, discuss two skills, guidelines, or behaviors that can help to minimize game
playing in relationships.
45. Discuss the three different orientations to conflict and give an example of each.
46. Explain the five principles of conflict.
47. In Chapter 9, Julia Wood discusses the concept of grace. Define this concept and explain under what conditions and in
what relationships showing grace is appropriate and inappropriate.
48. What are some ways for handling workplace conflict effectively?
49. What are the characteristics of forgiveness? How is forgiveness a part of conflict? Describe an example from your
own experiences when forgiveness was part of the conflict process.
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Answer Key
1. False
2. False
3. True
24. c
25. a
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32. e
33. b
40. Responses will vary. Refer to Table 9.1 (p. 272) for a summary list of constructive and unproductive communication
behaviors. Look for students to integrate principles of verbal communication (Chapter 4), nonverbal behavior (Chapter 5),
and listening (Chapter 6), which are discussed in the closing sections for each of their respective chapters.
41. Conflict patterns are influenced by how people respond to tension. Inclinations to exit, neglect, show loyalty, or voice
than win–lose (since most of the games Berne identified stem from a win–lose orientation to conflict).
45. Answers will vary. Students should be able to discuss: lose–lose, win–lose, and win–win approaches to conflict. See p.
266–269.
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46. To review, we’ve discussed five principles of interpersonal conflict. First, we noted that conflict is both natural and
inevitable in interpersonal relationships. Second, we discovered that conflict can be directly communicated or covertly
48. See p. 278 “Conflict in the workplace.” Dr. Hendrie Weisinger is a therapist and consultant who has much experience
in dealing with workplace conflict. His book Anger at Work (1996) offers two suggestions for handling workplace
conflict effectively. First, try to defuse the conflict by improving the climate. Use your communication to demonstrate