Aleksandra Ivanova
Professor Corser
English 2010
October 18, 2012
Parenting Styles
Society has been changed over the years. Every day somebody becomes a parent and it is
hellish work. In such moments people remember their parents and the difficulties they
made them to go through. It is a great gift to become a parent but mother or father has to
take huge responsibility for the child`s future. The key for parents is to prepare children for
the psychological, physical and mental situations in which offspring have to survive and
succeed. Usually mothers participate in the parenting more than father. According to
history, the man had to feed and protect his family. On the other side, the woman`s job was
to cook dinner, keep the house clean and take care of the children. In our times, society is
different and people have changed the view on certain things. Thus, several parenting
styles were formed such as permissive, authoritative, uninvolved, authoritarian, neglectful
and indulgent parenting style. People can choose any style that will fit their standards but
people have to remember that love and understanding is a key to a good and successful
parenting.
People life is all about being a child or being a parent. It sounds funny but is it true. First
part of a person`s life is being a child than an individual grows up and he or she has a little
bit of freedom about five to ten years and the process starts all over again except a “child”
is now in a role of parent. At this point people start to understand their parents. Usually, if
children or teenagers do something amoral or bad, humanity will blame on parents. People,
often, think these individuals had terrible parents which did not teach them what is good
and what is bad. Society should not forget that being a parent is the hardest job ever. .
Individuals who have never had a baby cannot judge people who are trying to be a good
parent. What does it mean being a “good parent”? “Good parenting—like every good
relationship—relies on telling your kids the truth, doing the tough things that build them
up for real, and avoiding the easy things that make them lean against you—all smiles and
hugs (which really do look and feel wonderful)—for support in a world you have
suggested is too tough for them to navigate on their own, ever” (Ablow). A little secret of
being a great mother or father is listening to your child. It is very important for children
and especially for teenagers to go and share their happiness with their parents. For example
a girl went to a tennis tournament for the weekend and she won it. The first thing she
would do could be a call to her mother because the girl wants her mom to be proud of her
and hear that she did a good job. Close relationships to children helps to know them better.
In this case if youth will get into trouble they will come talk to you not someone else.
Mother or father should become a minor`s friend but, at the same time, remember that he
or she is a parent, first of all, and then a friend.
There are many different parenting styles. Each parent prefers her or his own style.
Psychologists collected all of parenting methods and named those methods. The first one is
authoritarian parenting style. “Authoritarian Parents display little warmth and are highly
controlling. They are strict disciplinarians, use a restrictive, punitive style, and insist that
their adolescent follow parental directions” (Kopko 2). This is one of toughest parenting
styles. Parents control every part of child`s life. They put a lot of pressure on the children.
Authoritarian parents want to control everything and believe only in this way an adolescent
can achieve success. Usually during a conversation the say stuff like “You have to do it
because I said so” or “When you will be a parent you will decide for your kids”. These
kinds of kids emotionally abused. In this case these children can become uncontrollable
and reliant on their parents. Uncontrollable person might be hostile and violent which is
not good for society. Dependent teenagers are more likely to be reliant on their parents but
it can be whoever. They just feel like somebody has to control them. Adolescents are not
able to make a big decision by themselves. Authoritarian parents usually do not have any
problems with their offspring during the childhood because a child does not really have her
or his own personal life. Problems show up when a teenager want to have a little bit of
privacy. These parents will not let them have a personal life because all parents care about
is grades at school and health. On their opinion good grades will make children happy but
it is not true. Youngsters need to learn from their own mistakes or they will not know what
is good or bad and always will wait somebody`s advice. Authoritarian style fits Chinese
families. Most people heard or maybe read a book “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” by
Amy Chua. This book is about a mother who forced her girls to work really hard every
day, every second to reach success. She controlled every part of their lives. On the first
page a person will see how hard Amy is on her kids. “Here are some things daughters,
Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do: attend a sleepover, have a play date, be in a
