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Mahween Ahmed
Images 1st
Negotiating Social Norms
In a society filled with principles, different languages, and behavior, the idea of
being socially normal is out of question. Principles are each individual’s own perceptions
and actions taken on what is right and what is wrong. After concluding what is right and
wrong, someone’s principle can be going against or for a certain type of idea or action.
For example, my principle can be to never smoke in my life. This is what I stand for, and
what I believe should be a valuable goal worth striving for. Others may not agree with
my way of thinking and not consider the idea of smoking being a bad thing to do.
Everyone has their own opinions on certain topics. A society is made up of different
people, with different backgrounds, which means we all speak different languages. We
all did not have the same parents, so we were all raised differently as well. This
concludes to everyone having a different type of behavior. Our reactions, statements, and
ideology are based on what we are raised to think, and our own input of the world.
There are many types of norms. A descriptive norm is what is commonly done is
a certain type of situation. For example, when someone walks into an elevator, it would a
descriptive norm to turn around to face the door while inside the elevator. By not doing
this, people would look at you weird and think it is not normal behavior. Another type of
norm is an injunctive norm. This is what is commonly approved or disapproved in a
certain culture. For example, in the Indian culture it is normal to have arranged
marriages. However, in other cultures this many not be normal. A prescriptive norm is a
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rule that society follows blindly without thinking anything of it. Closing the faucet after
washing your hands is a prescriptive norm. It would not make sense to not close the
faucet, although it is not a written rule anywhere that that is what you must do. People in
society think of this as common behavior and follow this rule every time. A proscriptive
norm is an unwritten rule that society knows as what not to do. For example, blowing
cigarette smoke into a stranger’s mouth would be considered as a proscriptive norm.
Everyone should generally know this is not acceptable behavior even though it is not
written down anywhere. It can be considered as common sense and manners. Going
against any type of norm would be considered a deviance.
Deviance is a term used for the behavior that goes against social norms. There are
three ways deviance can be categorized. One is an act of deviance that can be positively
sanctioned. For example, if a person broke into their neighbor’s house to stop a robbery
from happening, this would be a positively sanctioned act of deviance because there was
a good cause to this action. Another way is negatively sanctioned. For example, if
someone were to commit a murder, this is obviously a crime and inhumane. The
consequences would be of negative feedback. Another way is with no particular
sanction. This is an act that is performed that would appear odd to society, but it is quite
harmless; therefore, there is no action or punishment/reward needed. An example would
be someone who likes to eat molded bread. This is something that society would think of
as weird; therefore making it a deviance, however there is no end result.
Although we are broadly different, social norms are still restricting us to act a
certain way. We are expected to have principles that benefit ourselves, but to a limit. For
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example, if my principle was to be loyal to my life partner until the end of time, I would
follow through with this; however, if my life partner were to commit a crime, I am
expected to turn him in to the police, or government to deal with. This brings a question
of whether I was loyal to my life partner “until the end of time”, or if I was following the
basic social norm of being a good citizen and protecting my community. Society would
back me up on this situation saying I was being a dedicated citizen, but my injunctive
norm would be broken as in some cultures, once you are married, it is your obligation to
do whatever you can to protect your spouse. Even during wedding vows, people take an
oath to protect their life partner against any harm. So why is it that a social norm can get
in the way of promises or another social norm? It is because of the society we live in and
what is expected of us and citizens first.
Being raised by Indian parents, I know two languages: Urdu and Hindi. Being
raised in America, I have learned to speak English more fluently than I know how to
speak Urdu and Hindi. Although my cultural parents taught me the language they grew
up speaking, America expects me to know and speak fluent English. This can be
categorized as a social norm because if I were to walk into any store, the language I
would speak in is English. America is a country with multiple backgrounds that make up
the population. It does not matter though, because even though English is not the official
language of America, it still is a majority of what society expects of us.
The way we act is also based upon the way we are raised and our own input. For
example, I could be raised to always speak my mind about any issue that I am confronted
with. If this was something I believed in, I would practice this method at all times;
however, when being handcuffed by the police and told, “You have the right to remain
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silent. Anything you say or do can and will be held against you in a court of law”, I will
not speak my mind even if I have something to say. My input would be to use common
sense and just listen to a person of authority or I would get in trouble. If I were to speak
my mind at that moment, I would be accused of rebelling against the police and this
would be a deviant act that is negatively sanctioned. Being able to take what society
expects from the people who make up the community and our own principles and
ideologies, we have all learned to negotiate with these social norms. Movies are visual
examples that show us how characters, directors, or even ideas are battling more social
norms than the actual enemy in the film. To the audience it may not be as obvious
because we are used to seeing this in real life; however, it is what makes the film more
interesting and the direction and plot more unique.
Restricting Practices
These movies also teach the concept of not caring what others think. Since Jamie
knows she is dying, she doesn’t seem to care what anyone thinks about her wearing the
same sweater every day, or that she seems to be a little anti social. Inside her mind,
Jamie knows these people won’t matter to her anywhere in the future. She also
influences Landon to have the same way of thinking. After having rowdy friends, he
becomes simpler with life and leaves behind his immaturity. This is an intriguing thought
because if I was able to go through a whole day without caring what anyone at all would
think, I’d be able to be completely myself, and perhaps find more things about myself
that I didn’t even know. Of ten times, society restricts us to what is “normal” and we
cannot find the individuality which is hidden within ourselves. The community in which
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we live in is defaulted to a certain dressing style, or speaking manner. If one were to
change the way they dress themselves or the way they speak, they would be an outcast to
the community. They would not be considered “normal” because they are not the same
as the rest of the people. This prevents many people from taking a step and finding what
they truly are comfortable with. Usually guys are meant to be tough and act a certain
way. In A Walk to Remember, Landon is the main character and even though he is not
the one who has cancer, he is the struggling with the idea of losing his girlfriend. Cancer
acts as an inspiration to Landon because he gathers the strength to bear with Jamie after
he finds out that she is going to die. He continues to better his character and strive a little
harder in order to achieve Jamie’s happiness. Landon is a dynamic character in the film.
