Doty 1
Jacob Doty
Professor Hodgkinson
COMM 321
23 September 2015
An Exploration of Self
I believe identifying and learning about who you are is a life-long journey since we are
constantly changing and interacting with others. The way you act and may be perceived also
depends on your roles as you connect with other people using different ways of speaking. In my
life, my roles are being a son, a businessman, and a college student.
While being a son, the majority of direct definition I receive is from my mom. She always
taught me to be strong and to always be respectful, especially to women. Even while in a lot of
physical pain like when I broke my arm riding a horse when I was little, she would tell me to
toughen up and to stop crying. This has been burned into my head and is now how I take any
injury on and off the field in lacrosse or in life. We, as men, are also shaped by society’s norms
of what it means to go from a boy of a son to a grown man as a son. This has shown that men
are supposed to be muscular, strong, and wealthy. Although I can’t tell if it is a good or bad
thing, I do try and hold myself to these norms set by others. This self-fulfilling prophecy seems
to be a positive impact on my life because it taught me to work hard, stay healthy, and be
stable for the future. As a son, you do have certain rules for living and growing up with this role.
Parents will often say, “You must do anything for your mom” or “Work hard in school and it will
Doty 2
pay off in the long run.” These are scripts that I believe in and must live up to. These
expectations have been set, and I have always worked toward these goals. When you do start
to make progress and see that you are fitting into the goals you and society have set, then your
self-esteem definitely goes up. I don’t know a single person who wouldn’t feel great about
being in shape and muscular, while being financially well off. On the other hand, I do think this
role can be negative as it forces you to focus on success and what you are working on next,
instead of relaxing and enjoying the moment and all of the greatness around you. While
growing up with a single mom who was working to provide for us, I had an anxious/ambivalent
attachment style. I witnessed my parents get a divorce at a young age and moved out from my
dad’s house to solely be with my mom pretty early in my life, too. Since she was always busy I
